It’s Friday, which means it’s time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. For this weeks contest you may substitute your own message for the handwritten entry on the picture, if so desired. Winning entries (if they provided alternate text) will have the text Photoshopped into the picture. Enter your best caption for the following picture:
Winners will be announced Sunday.
Update: Winners announced (click the link to read the winning entries). Comments are now closed.
Kos & Co. offer up their proof that Hitler actually chose George Bush as his heir.
The writing is described by experts as difficult to decipher, but after consulting their consciences, they concluded it said “Pay Halliburton Now! –Chimpy McBusHitler”.
Dear, Bobby Bird
On behalf of the entire Third Reich we welcome you into the Nazi Youth party. May you grow up to be a loyal Nazi!
Sincerly, Adolf Hitler
We have had some unfortunate media coverage because of the inconsistant air conditioning at our camp in the tropics. We should consider some equivalent, though less visible means and location for our Final Sollution. Any ideas?
Ciao,
AH
Dear Mr. Durbin, may i remind you that any comparisons using my name have to first be cleared by my propaganda minister. Improper use of my name may have serious consequences. In the future, please use my full name, Adolph Hitler.
Bids at Christies for 1938 Christmas Card signed by Hitler were disappointing despite the handwritten note saying “The French are Pussies”
Dear Henry,
Thanks for the offer to build me a fleet of cars and trucks, but I think I’ll be happier building my own.
Love,
Adolf
New handwritten portion: “Lassen Sie Freiheit zum Regieren!”
Now why do I feel dirty having written that?
Remember me.
Remember my atrocities.
Never again.
Burning in hell, I am yours.
Adolph
Yikes, they are coming!
What a furor.
Where’s the gun?
Oh.
Let me be played in the movies by Brad Pitt.
Bye,
Your Fuhrer
“Guantanimo is too hard to spell call it something like Aushwitz.”
ok that was out of line but I got more!
“I dont think a employee pricing is a good idea for the new panzers I mean volkswagons”
“Next year the kieobosa will be fresher”
Today I was spoken to very rudely by a Jew. If ever I am a leader of Germany I will kill as many as I can get my hands on. And it will be their fault for not caring and understanding about my feelings.
While the “Hitler Letter” showing a direct link between the Nazis and President Bush’s grandfather was proved to be a forgery, Dan Rather and CBS still maintain that the letter is “fake but accurate.”
I will order acts of such evil, that henceforth no man will dare utter my name alongside any other, for fear that he might diminish the singularity of my guilt.
— Adolf.
Eva,
Please note on the planner for next Saturday: “Oktoberfest afterbar at our house. Rent hot tub. Remember to return keg spigots to the liquor store Monday or we won’t get our deposit back.”
Love,
Sugarbumpkins
Translation: “Hey, did you know Valerie Plame works for the CIA?”
Did I say “Jew Year”? I meant “New Year”! Oh, faux pas on me.
Dear Deutschland,
I am leaving for Hollywood to persue my dreams.
Yours,
A
PS – Please send money.
Warmest Holiday Greetings, Herr Rommel.
I hate to admit it, but I didn’t think this extermination of Jews thing all the way through.
Here it is just two weeks away, and I still can’t book a comedian for our Christmas party.
And I have given up even trying to find a good corned beef sandwich anywhere in Europe!
Oy vey, what’s a Nazi to do?
Peace on Earth, good will to men,
Aldolph
American Soldier 1: What does it say?
American Soldier 2:It reads, “Here may be found the last words of Joseph of Aramathia. He who is valiant and pure of spirit may find the holy grail in the Castle of Aaauuuggghhh…”
American Soldier 1:The Castle of Aaaauuuggghhhh? What does that mean?
American Soldier 2:He must have died while writing it
American Soldier 1:Look, if he was dying, he wouldn’t have bothered to carve ‘Aaaauuuggghhhh’. He’d just say it
American Soldier 2:Maybe he was dictating it
as the world turns:
joe wilson has just returned from a secret mission somewhere in west texas that has exposed karl rove’s direct link to adolf hitler! senator schumer has submitted the evidence to the press today, claiming wildly “we got him boys!!”, “and it’s accurate ,too!”
Dear JS,
I know I said that we’d split Poland fair and square, but I saw you looking at Eva the other night.
That’s gonna cost you! Bigtime!
AH
Herr Himmler – Send the Schwarzenegger family double their regular ration of human growth hormone. The Fourth Reich begins in California!
Feed my cat.
Coming to the DU any moment now…
Translation:
“I hearby order George Walker Bush to report to a physical, in order to qualify for his Texas Luftwaffe Guard comission.” Signed, Adolf Hitler
As typed on a 1941 IBM typewritter, by his secretary, Fraulein Knox.
OR
“Please send this sample of mein DNA to Herr Doktor Mengle, to be used in the chimpanze hybrid experiment. Remind him I am rather fond of the name George” XOXO, Dolphie H.
Ich bin ein Bushhitler
(Translation of Card:)
You are formally invited to the installment of Herr Karl Rove as the Chancellor of the Reich
(Scribbled Text:)
Bring your wife, Joe!
“Hi, I’m a liberal and I’m demanding that you make Hitler stop drawing about me! Make him stop! Stop it now! I hope all you Nazis frogmarch him!”
Liberals were next.
Dear Jacques Chirac,
You sissy-boy. Whether Islamo-fascists or the real deal, why do you Frenchies always roll over?
Love, ‘Dolph.
“Dearest Dears: I have just returned from the future where I enjoyed a special cocktail with Howard Dean and an immense influx of funds from some tall guy who said that money was no object to him because it belonged to the collective soul of underlings (or, perhaps he said it was the collective soul of underlings, I am not now sure — the Return Send process was difficult since I had to go to New York City to find the key to the machine in the backroom of some woman soldier named Hill). I also visited a movie set and had a massage by someone who wanted me to tour a facility dressed in pink but I think I managed to encourage a dressing up in liberal dark green grandeur for the holidays under the ruling dark sun. Even in the future, there are the willing. LOL, HH.”
June 15, 1940
Dear Kleagle Byrd,
As per your request we are shipping today all the white flags our soldiers confiscated in France in the last few weeks. I hope they will fit your Klansmen. Keep up the good work!
Best wishes,
Your Friend
Adolph
Alternative text:
Nur Nationalsozialistische
Deutsche Arbeiterpartei ist Nationalsozialistische
Deutsche Arbeiterpartei
Alternative handwriting:
Verstehen Sie, Herr Durbin?
Only the Nazis are Nazis. Do you understand, Mr. Durbin?
Norm wins this one hands down.
Dearest Mr. Joseph Kennedy:
My warmest regards to you and family in this holiday season. I hope to see you this summer for the Olympics where we will beat some butts.
Speaking of beating butts, you will be pleased to know the great progress we have made towards 100 armored divisions and 3000 advanced aircraft – not to mention the submarines. (I know you will not speak of this).
This should make short work of the French and English and allow Ireland independence to be restored in full. I have just spoken to GOD and he will fix things with the Vatican.
In the meantime, please keep feeding the English useless BS about how we will never attack!
Only 996 years left!
Yours truly,
Adolph
I’m dreaming of a white Christmas.
With every Christmas card I write.
May your days be merry and bright.
And may all your Christmases be white.
The Fuher
Printed card text: “We need to invade England immediately!”
Handwritten text: “After Finland, it’s the country with the worst food.”
THINGS TO DO
Ein – Drop off Hitler Youth at Band Practice
Zwei – Conquer France
Drei – Pick Up Dry Cleaning.
Text
You Are Invited To A Scavenger Hunt
Here is your only hint.
Written
Pants in jalapenos by Thames.
DRUDGEBREAKING: Hillary Clinton conclusively proved today that Bush=Hitler as the New York Senator revealed a document indicating that both Hitler and Bush did sign their Form 180’s
Update: Winners announced (click the link to read the winning entries). Comments are now closed.