It’s Friday, which means it’s time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™.
Update: Winners announced. Comments are now closed.
Weekend Caption Contest™
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Kevin
Kevin founded Wizbang in 2003. He still contributes occasionally and handles all the technical and design work for the site.
That boy’s shore got a purty mouth.
Is it just me, or is Kerry wearing lipstick?!? That is one seriously conflicted dude, who appears to not be comfortable with who he is (ok, let’s try botox, orange treatments, lipstick).
You’re wearing perfume AND make up? What are you, a girlie man??
“All my men wear English Leather.”
Bush: “Tell me something – does your wife know you’ve been kissing Chirac’s ass?”
Hey John, not only can I see right through you, I’m can walk through you too.
No wonder Kerry’s got a problem concentrating on the issues, he’s walking around with a big chimp on his shoulder…
(someone had to do it)
How many bags do you have to put over Teresa’s head?
“Hey, Lurch, your bolts are showing!”
President Bush appeared to be irritated by the fact that Kerry actully smelled like a Frenchman during last nights debate….
I will have to ask Laura if his lip gloss matches his shoes?
“Psst, hey John, check out that chick with the see-through dress. I’d like to… oh, dude! That’s your daughter!”
I’ll shove my hand up your.. Hey Kerry! Allawi says hello!
George Motions: “You see this guys fucking makeup? Must have come from windsurfing with the ‘boys'”.
While the rules of the debate engagement expressly forbid the networks from showing the reaction expressions on each candidates face, neither side had the forethought to forbid this Salvador Dali likeness of the two.
Kerry: Hey, that chick’s pretty hot! I think she’s making eyes with me…
Bush: Why is Jenna barfing?
Bush: Dude, they know you’re full of shit….
Hey John? What’s the capital of Thailand?
– “Psssst….Don’t forget to mention I served in Vietnam…”…”Iraq is NOT Vietnam you chucklehead….and your clothes smell like Teh-ray-zaaa…”
Senator Kerry, fresh from his manicure in South Beach, listens to instructions prior to last nights debate….
So why isn’t anyone picking up on this “Treblinka Square” gaffe by Kerry? Treblinka was a Nazi concentration camp, not a KGB archive location. Kerry was trying to sound knowledgeable about Russia, and as I see it, he just goofed.
Aha! He still has bronzing cream on the back of his neck and behinds his ear.
How much is she worth?
Bush: *psst* Hey Laura, can we hire this clown for our wedding anniversary?
Keep staring at my daughters like that and you’ll be a test target for one of my new bunker busters
Bush: Yeah, you’re right there John. Your lipstick does match BOTH Teresa’s AND Laura’s dress. You must be proud.
Fashion police! Over here!! He’s got pink lipstick with a red tie!
Yes, I wear foundation. Yes, I live with a man. Yes, I’m a middle- aged fag. But I know who I am, Val. It took me twenty years to get here, and I’m not gonna let some idiot president destroy that. Fuck the president, I don’t give a damn what he thinks.
Kerry: “You know, it
“…wow, would you look at the bazoomers on her!”
Bush – John, you old son of a bitch! How ya doin’? How do you feel about that call today? I mean the Dolphins! Fourth-and-three play on their 30 yard line with only 34 seconds to go!
Kerry – How do you think I feel? Betrayed, bewildered…
Uh oh, it’s only been 45 minutes, and we’re over 30 responses…. better knock it of people, Maha’s gonna get pissy again!!!
Yes, George, my post-debate party will be at The Birdcage. Why do you ask?
W: “As soon as we get all this damn TV makeup stripped, wanna go for a beer?”
J with Shocked look: You take off the makeup?
I’m fixin’ to turn you into a puppet, son
Utah State University researcher finds photographic evidence that Bush and Kerry are secret lovers!
Story to break next week in
Kerry: You look so annoyed.
Bush: That’s because you’re annoying.
“I know pronounce you President and wife”
know=now
Got you by the balls now, wanna learn what ‘pre-emptive means?!
The two presidential candidates violate the debate rules, and the laws of physics, by occupying the same space at the same time.
Kerry:”See that pasty looking guy in the third row”
Bush:”You mean the guy sucking his thumb and wearing and wearing ladies panties on his head?”
Kerry:”Yea thats the one” “He’s the guy who told that when his wife goes out,he invites his friends over..and get this..they sit around in their underwear drinking beer,giggling, and entering caption contests !!!”
Bush:”Really???” “Why there should be a Constitutional ammendment against behavior like that.”
Kerry:”Hey we finally AGREE on something”.
John, let me rest my head on your shoulder.
Mmmm…it feels almost like Dick’s.
ah…..so safe. I’m glad that debate thing is all overey wovery.
MMmmm…
“Yore lips sure is purty. Back in Texas we use cowboy lip gloss to prevent chapped lips. You stick your finger in a cow pie and smear it on your smackers. Tain’t cherry flavored like your’s, but it sure as hell keeps you from lickin’ em.”
Bush: 500 mil?
Kerry: Know how they say money isn’t everything? Somedays I agree.
Bush: Somedays not?
Kerry: You’d think…
Tsk. Tsk. Manicure, spray tan, but no selson blue.
“First they paint him up and now they’re going to shove that fat film director’s head… WHERE?”
GB: You know John after this is all over, I could really use a good stiff drink!
JK: Sure George, just contact my secretary and she will setup a date for you in the library on January 4th.
GB: You know John after this is all over, I could really use a good stiff drink!
JK: Sure George, just contact my secretary and she will setup a date for you in the library on January 4th.
Let me guess… the perfume is French
Cripes Laura, I think he’s wearing your shade of lipstick.
Try not to get any of that on my collar.
Can you believe there are people thinking of voting for this cross-dressing freak?
Kerry – “Oooh. Who is that kissable hunk?”
Bush – “That would be your running mate – what an appropriate label.”
Bush – “Laura, are you absolutely positive I can’t have the secret service just shoot this guy?”