Weekend Caption Contest™

118 Comments

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1. Stephen W. Stanton January 28, 2005

   Sir, you only get to vote ONCE. What kind of ass-backwards third-world electoral system do you think we’re running here?
2. [GARAGE_DEFEAT] January 28, 2005

   flight schools accused of racial profiling after 9/11 Comission report surfaces

   “As you can see Mr. Andwafhar, The Pantone Skintone chart lists you as a 731C. Two shades lighter and you would have been a shoe-in…”
3. BorgQueen January 28, 2005

   If you take the #8 bus to Mosul and run like hell, you’ll just make the #33 camel to Tikrit…..hop a mule, head for the border, and you’ll be in Iran by Tuesday.
4. Bryan January 28, 2005

   “Great! And now we can go on and select the interior color and fabric choices. Now with your Sport package…”
5. jmaster January 28, 2005

   “You mark it here if you want to vote for, uh, how do you say this “powwoynw”, er, ah, “powwoynw”, mmm…”

   “Oops! I had it upside down!”
6. Brian January 28, 2005

   “I’ll vote for whoever I want, GOSH”
7. OneDrummer January 28, 2005

   An Iraqi expatriate citizen votes by provisional ballot in King County, Washington today, proving he really is indeed dead.
8. player of blues January 28, 2005

   Im sorry Mr. Aju-Bin-Hajimaliradbasqat, but everyone in THIS column has already been assasinated.
9. igna January 28, 2005

   The Karaoke creator reveals THE big secret
10. BlogDog January 28, 2005

    Yes, as a matter of fact I am pro-choice.
11. Moon Monkey January 28, 2005

    …OK Alex,I’ll take Florida Elections for $200…
12. Moon Monkey January 28, 2005

    …Now if I pick this one do you think I’ll get it in the end? Will I finally get everything I’ve got coming to me?
13. HeyMike January 28, 2005

    But Mr. McMahon, are you sure my name is not on the list of winners? Please check again, Hassan, Mohamed Hassan…
14. Moon Monkey January 28, 2005

    …Now when you say that we’ll be voting in
    the “Sky Boxes”,what does that mean exactly?
15. Moon Monkey January 28, 2005

    …I see that “Jesus Kid” has been scratched,but that doesn’t mean that I can’t vote for “Bomb Boy 500”!
16. Moon Monkey January 28, 2005

    …And for my final choice,put me down for the Eagles and 10 points…
17. Mantis January 28, 2005

    The most important issue to you this election is:
    A) Infrastructure
    B) Security
    C) House destroyed
    D) Moral Values
18. golfer January 28, 2005

    Now Mr. Abdulah, if you vote democrat here, that is all you will need to enter the United States.
19. Eric January 28, 2005

    What’s Arabic for Butterfly Ballot?
20. Eric January 28, 2005

    Despite Al-Zarqawi’s best efforts the Iraqis take a lesson from Washington State and also let dead people vote.
21. Eric January 28, 2005

    Lotto mania strikes Iraq.
22. Eric January 28, 2005

    “This is so complicated… I know C, C, C, C,…”
23. Eric January 28, 2005

    “HMMMM??? A nine letter word for a form of government, starting with a ‘D’. Damn this New York Times crossword puzzle.”
24. Teflon93 January 28, 2005

    “I’m sorry, Senator Kennedy, but there is no ballot referendum on ejecting Americans or drowning secretaries….”
25. Eric January 28, 2005

    An observer from Washington State visits Baghdad to learn how to perform an election.
26. Beth January 28, 2005

    امدح اللّه ! This is so much simpler than that Caleeforneea recall ballot!
27. RR January 28, 2005

    This was so much easier when my choices were “Saddam” or “kill my family”
28. Superhawk January 28, 2005

    “Do you realize how many Mohammed’s there are on this list?”
29. OneDrummer January 28, 2005

    Exit polling at the Tikrit Spider Hole Club showed an early projected winner… Hussein.
30. OneDrummer January 28, 2005

    Freddy ‘Abdullah’ Mitchell thanks his hands for allowing himself to cast a ballot in the Iraqi elections today….

    Note: for reference, see Eagles post-game interviews…. 🙂
31. Drew January 28, 2005

    Yes, Mr. Hassid, you can vote for any candidate you choose.

    But will they really save you money on your car insurance?
32. R. DEHAVEN January 28, 2005

    WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE? R. DEHAVEN – grandcherokee1@msn.com
33. McGehee January 28, 2005

    “I never thought we could ever achieve an election without Viagra!”
34. Joe R. the Unabrewer January 28, 2005

    Man, voting is da bomb…wait, no, no, I didn’t say “bomb,” you must have misunderstood me!
35. m January 28, 2005

    One man, one vote.
36. John Ess January 28, 2005

    Lessee – ware iss “NO”?
37. Robin Goodfellow January 28, 2005

    Crap, this is so complicated, and if I don’t get it right P. Diddy is going to kill me!
38. gibsonz January 28, 2005

    Yes I am sure I was disenfranchised,you only see me voting in three precients don`t you!
39. Hodink January 29, 2005

    “Bush, his name is Dubya? I want to write in Dubya Bush.”
40. Billy January 29, 2005

    multiplication tables? when will I ever need this stuff?
41. JimK January 29, 2005

    “Vote? First, as a CITIZEN JOURNALIST I demand pie! I am so, I have a Blogspot blog, dammit.”
42. Cybrludite January 29, 2005

    So, how much does it say I can get for my “Urza’s Sanctified IED”?
43. nizzo January 29, 2005

    A day at the greyhound track. An unidentified man bets $5 on Wizbang to place in the nights first race.
44. Rodney Dill January 29, 2005

    Crap, this is so complicated, and if I don’t get it right P. Diddy is going to kill me!

    Good one!
45. Harvey January 29, 2005

    Iraq prepares to institute the “Crayola 120” Terror Alert System.
46. spacemonkey January 29, 2005

    Ahmed scores 1410 on his SAT’s.
47. Diane January 29, 2005

    What’s Arabic for Butterfly Ballot?

    اِقْتِراع بَشَّارَة

    But that might come across as “A vote is an insect.”
48. Jeff Blogworthy January 29, 2005

    “My name is Ted Kennedy and I am ordering you to go home immediately. Don’t you understand that we want the same thing as the insurgents? You are part of the problem. Why aren’t you listening to me? Go Home!…”
49. Drew - Dallas, TX January 29, 2005

    “Why is gay marriage not on this ballot? I do not see it here.”
50. OneDrummer January 29, 2005

    Do you know anything about that guy running for Superior Court Judge in District 3 ?

    I hear he only stoned four people to death in his last term…..
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