It’s Friday, which means it’s time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:
Winners will be announced Monday morning.
Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.
And for our entree, we’ll be having lame duck.
Obama: “What’s the best idea I ever came up with…. Blaming Bush.”
“No, Seriously Hillary. Go schedule my tee time.”
The Error Apparent to the throne
Sorry, Hillary, but there won’t actually be an election in 2016.
Barry: “Hey, you hear where Hooson turned 58 today”
Hillary: “Yeah, but his jokes are no better!”
Hillary: “You done shitty.”
Barry: “Yeah, I done shitty.”
Hillary: “Yeah, you done shitty….”
Soylent Greens
Hillary: “Did you hear that Hooson won’t be writing any crummy captions this week?”
Barry: “What happened?”
Hillary: “His long beard got caught in his motorcycle chain…..and, well….”
You should love yourself a little more. Weirdo.
Just poking a little fun at how bad many of my jokes are this week, fuckhead…
Just poking fun at you. It’s a little weird how much you like yourself and how much you have to tell the rest of the world about it. That’s all.
I guess I see it this way. Barack Obama entered office with high hopes of making things better and a head filled with lofty dreams of making a difference. The public believed in him and twice elected him president. But, failures to be able to achieve very much, a nagging bad economy, political realities of a congress not sold on his policies, failures to delegate responsibility to the right people, have pretty much summed up his second term as a real failure. So, along comes some little shit like me, making fun of him for being a failure and I can’t even write a few good jokes about that, let alone try the manage to whole U.S. like he’s trying to do. – I’m not above a little ridicule here at my own expense for a little comedy.
I think the nagging bad economy’s his own fault – with the ‘never let a crisis go to waste’ philosophy of governance leading to ‘fixes’ that didn’t allow the economy to self-correct. By the time things started to change, he’d ‘fix’ it again.
Paul, you and I go way back but you do have a strong tendency to self aggrandize. ww
The self-promotion joke actually started with Jay Tea, it used to piss him off in some private Emails we exchanged with each other. He was fun to mess with for laughs. He was an excellent writer….far better than I’ll ever be, and I told him that before. But, at some point he became genuinely angry, and I could never apologize enough for messing with him for a few laughs. – Look back at how many times Jay Tea would get pissed in some old threads at me. But, he just never seemed to get the joke. He was a great writer, but a little dense with the logic and reason. Like building the Empire State Building on a bad foundation.- I’m maybe a little bit of a punk and bully at times. But, not that bad of a hoodlum. I’m mostly a down to Earth guy who likes to make people laugh a little, that’s all.
I still think you resemble Treebeard from Lord of the Rings.
Nah, his jokes aren’t ‘wooden’ enough.
Nah.
If he can clean up his act, I think Paul might have a future making duck calls.
I actually thought the joke about my beard being so long that it got caught in the chain as a cause of death was kind of funny here. And my jokes were so piss poor this week that it was funny to tie that in with an absurd make believe Barry and Hillary exchange. – No one should be above a little comedy. I just wanted to make some people laugh today. – Yeah, I got that duck call guy look going. It’s funny….
The caption contest is about the photo that Kevin posted. It isn’t about a photo of you that you wanted posted. THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU. Get over yourself.
Just down ding him and move on.
Yeah, my original caption joke was about Kevin’s caption. Hillary and Barry have a funny exchange that I won’t be telling any crummy jokes about them this week because my beard was so long it got caught in the motorcycle chain and I died. This caption contest is supposed to be giving people a laugh, which I was trying to do, and you want to turn it into personal attacks here. You must be the guy who automatically votes down any joke I post under my own name, but when I used a made up name with a different computer then things are different, suddenly I’m funny to you. Go figure. And go lighten up. This contest is supposed to be fun here. – Maybe, instead of joking about myself here I should have told jokes about you instead. Let’s laugh at you a little. -Where’s your funny captions? Just insults when I joke…
I do make submissions to the contest. Unlike others, I understand that I am not that funny so my submissions are limited.
Funny, I’m actually a writer here at the Wizbang network, and I only have a little over 1,000 posts or comments total. But, you have nearly 11,000 comments to your credit. So we won’t talk about big egos, will we?
I discuss the article, not myself.
Dude it is hard to take you seriously after seeing you on a tricycle.
I have other motorcycles as well. That trike has a springer front end with six sets of springs and a custom frame powered by a Yamaha Verago V-Twin with a trunk and cargo space. It has a 5 speed wet clutch transmission with a sixth reverse gear because of the long body length. I became a fan of the trikes back in the 1960’s when Ed “Big Daddy” Roth, the Revell Model Car guy, started to build custom trikes and became an associate of the Hells Angels MC. – I like the Big Mike’s Chopper too. It has a 1648cc engine. But is a little too loud to suit me.
Just like you need training wheels on your motorcycle, it reads like you need training wheels on your life!
It has two wheel drive for bad weather traction much like the $17,000 Russian Urals do, which are great in Siberian weather. It has cargo racks and a trunk that my two-wheelers don’t have. – But, hey this contest is supposed to be about jokes. – What does any of this have to do with my original joke that I told about Hillary and Barry having a funny exchange that I died from a beard accident, so I won’t post any jokes this week.? – I often joke about Rodney Dill or Fustian’s jokes, but I joke about myself and I get a back full of arrows here, started by Jim. What gives?
No, dude! How long did it take you to grow that fungus to it’s old length, anyway?
After my mother died in 2007 I began to face a lot of bad stuff and just sort of grew into motorcycles and beards. I started that beard in 2008 because I got cold when I rode around in 30 degree weather.
Hillary: “Anthony Weiner is at least funny…..You’re only shitty.”
A Weekend Caption Thread So Bad That Even Rodney Dill And Fustian Can’t Save It….
Seriously?
It’s actually gotten a little better in the last few minutes….But, it wasn’t going well at first here. Last week’s Anthony Weiner jokes just flow easier right out of the gate…
Just got back from breakfast. Sorry.
Breakfast? Where are you at?
Home now.
It’s was a late breakfast.
All The Good Jokes Are On Vacation This Week….
True, as an example.. Miley Cyrus’s house caught fire. Within 30 seconds, the fire fighters rushed out of the building and quickly returned with gallons of more gasoline. Turns out that the fire was taking too long to burn her collection of twerking videos.
And yet I publish photos of the 20 year old flashing her vagina at Wizbang Pop because enough people actually want to see that. Maybe that part’s better than her music or acting. She found her hidden talent.
Maybe you should put the prick and twat contest photo above on Wizbang Pop.
And yet I publish photos of the 20 year old flashing her vagina at Wizbang Pop because enough people actually want to see that. Maybe that part’s better than her music or acting. She found her hidden talent.
If This Was A Boxing Match The Referee Would Call The Match….
Hillary: “What do you call Hooson’s feeble attempts at humor this week?”
Barry: “Thread killers…”
He: “How’d you like the pureed puppies?”
She: “I prefer chopped kittens.”
The divorce was amicable… but neither wanted Bill nor Joe.
“Always two there are. No more, no less. A Master and an apprentice.”
Hillary: “I’ve been meaning to ask you this for years. Your background, it’s from both a Black and a White background. So if you had a housefire back home at your Chicago home, do you rescue the TV or the golfclubs first….”
Hillary: “Let me guess. Michelle selected our meal for us.”
Barack: “Yeah, but I sent Joe out to get us something from McDonalds.”
Hillary: “So, how about us doing some salad tossing while we’re waiting”.
Holy Christ! That’s a disturbing vision right there!
Sorry. I even ran out of hand sanitizer while typing it.
Holy Christ! That’s a disturbing vision right there!
Hillary: “I’m going to be hard pressed to find a running mate as crappy as Joe Biden……But, I promise to try!”
Two failures, one lunch.
Hillary: “Thank God for term limits, huh champ?”
Hillary: “These democratic voters, they gave us two chances to improve the economy, to prevent them from losing their jobs, to prevent them from losing their homes to foreclosures, to losing their marriages because of money problems….But, I’m going to ask them to give us one more chance.”
Hillary: “Both of us are in this photo. That means we’ll both be in the Wizbang caption contest.”
Barack: “It also means that Paul Hooson will probably say something about both of our houses being on fire.”
You can count on it!
Hillary: “Why isn’t Joe eating with us?”
Barack: “I told him that he couldn’t because of the sequester, and he believed me.”
Hillary, those bad things you said about me in the 2008 campaign still hurt.
What difference does it make?
Please don’t tell me we’re having Wieners for lunch.
Democrats….We Always Do The Job Right The Third Or Fourth Time…
So tell me, Barack, what else is in Bill’s browser history?
Lili Von Shtupp: Would you like another schnitzengruben?
Bart: No, thank you. Fifteen is my limit on schnitzengruben.
Lili Von Shtupp: Well, then how about a little…
[whispers in his ear]
Bart: Baby, please! I am not from Havana.
Lili Von Shtupp: Will I… see you again?
Bart: Well, it all depends on how much vitamin E I can get my hands on.
“We have to protect our phoney baloney jobs here! Harrumph! Harrumph! Harrumph!”
Hillary: “Do you think that Anthony Weiner will win the NYC mayoral race now that New Yorkers know about his sexual mischief?”
Barack: “Why not? New Yorkers voted for your husband . . . twice!”
It turns out that they both slept through that 3 AM phone call.
Barry: “So Hillary, if you had a housefire back home, what would be the first thing you’d rescue?”
Hillary: “My witch costume!”
SSDD
One’s incompetent, gained advantage from the work of others, let others take the blame for their mistakes, lied to the American public, and played their minority status for all its worth… and the other is pretty much the same.
One look at this photo, and ALF just flew back to what’s left of Melmac in horror and disgust…
Q: How can you surmise any good will come to the America people out of this meeting?
A: You take the ‘C’ out of TRUCK, and the ‘F’ out of WAY.
Terrorists.
Which one will be the first to go to jail?
Which one will be the first to go to jail?
Hillary: “Will you endorse me for President in 2016?”
Barack: “Only if you promise that, if you win, you won’t blame your predecessor for everything.”
Hillary: “I’ll take that as a No.”
Who woulda thought that Joe Biden would turn out to be the least incompetent person in my administration?
Hillary: “We are both in this photo. Do you know what that means?”
Barack: “Yeah. The Wizbang Caption Contest will set a new record for number of entries.”
Fat chance!
Fat chance!
This is the kind of crap Michelle wants me to eat. But don’t worry, there’s a pizza showing up in about 5 minutes…with cheesy bread.
Barack: “What a lousy meal that Michelle selected for us.”
Hillary: “She is standing behind you.”
Barack (with a louder voice): “As I was saying, what a great meal that Michelle selected for us.”
I’ve dreamed about being President since I was a little boy.
Hillary, me too!
Ebony and Ivory. Why can’t we rule forever in the land of the “Free”?
Does Michelle know?
But enough about me talking about me. How about you talk about me.
Everyone has wondered where Obama was during Benghazi, but now I wonder if Hillary was at the same place.
So now the price for Bill Clinton to rescue Obama in 2012 become clear. Barrack has to “keep Hillary occupied”.