Weekend Caption Contest™ Winners

This week’s Weekend Caption Contest™ was another smashing success. There were way too many excellent captions to honor, so go read the rest of the entries in the original post. The assignment this week was to caption the following picture:

U.S. first lady Michelle Obama dances on stage with school children during an event to bring physical activity back to schools, hosted by the American Alliance for Health, Physical Education, Recreation and Dance (AAHPERD) and the Alliance for a Healthier Generation in Chicago, Illinois, February 28, 2013. REUTERS/Jeff Haynes (UNITED STATES - Tags: POLITICS EDUCATION HEALTH SOCIETY)

Here are the winning entries:

1) (fustian24) – “I don’t know what it is, but it seems to be advancing on Tokyo.

2) (Rodney Dill) – “I’m not sayin’ how big it is, but it better beep when it backs up.

3) (RestlessLegs) – “Her dance received a score of 7.3 … on the Richter scale.

4) (Vagabond661) – “Where will you be when diarrhea strikes?

5) (Baron Von Ottomatic) – “Her 40 yard dash time was faster than expected but Michelle Obama’s performance in the shuttle and three-cone drill was the big story coming out of the NFL combine.

6) (LiberalNightmare) – “When Michelle does the Harlem shake, Harlem shakes.

The Readers Choice Award this week went to fustian24’s winning entry. In its place we offer the best use of a historical event in creating a contest entry:

(John H) – “The audience is practically still now they’ve started dancing; and (uh) they’ve begun a grinding motion. They are starting to rub again; it’s… the audience reaction has (uh) slacked up a little bit. The back pants of the FLOTUS are just holding it (uh) just enough to keep it from…It’s burst into flames! Get this, Charlie; get this, Charlie! It’s fire… and it’s crashing! It’s crashing terrible! Oh, my! Get out of the way, please! It’s burning and bursting into flames and the… and it’s falling on the dance floor. And all the folks agree that this is terrible; this is the worst of the worst catastrophes in the world. [indecipherable] its flames… Crashing, oh! Four- or five-hundred pounds into the studio and it… it’s a terrific crash, ladies and gentlemen. It’s smoke, and it’s in flames now; and the dance team is crashing to the ground, not quite to the floor. Oh, the humanity! And all the screaming screaming around here. I told you; it—I can’t even talk to people, their friends are in there! Ah! It’s… it… it’s a… ah! I… I can’t talk, ladies and gentlemen. Honest: it’s just laying there, mass of smoking wreckage. Ah! And everybody can hardly breathe and talk and the screaming. I… I… I’m sorry. Honest: I… I can hardly breathe. I… I’m going to step inside, where I cannot see it. Charlie, that’s terrible. Ah, ah… I can’t. Listen, folks; I… I’m gonna have to stop for a minute because [indecipherable] I’ve lost my voice. This is the worst thing I’ve ever witnessed.

That’s all for this weekend. A new edition of the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™ will debut Friday morning.

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