I am serious… and don't call me Shirley.

Call me cynical, but this is one of those stories that I just know would be really embarrassing for a lot of people should the truth come out. The truth being whatever “crime” was committed had been perpetrated by a member of a “protected class” in an effort to manufacture outrage and sympathy.

The University of California San Diego has suspended a student who admitted to hanging a noose in a campus library, school officials announced Friday.

“We are feeling real pain, and we will take real action,” said UCSD chancellor Marye Anne Fox told reporters. “The safety of our students, faculty, and staff is my primary concern.”

The student, whose identity was not released, admitted Friday to police at the University of California San Diego that she hung a noose Thursday night in the library, police said.

“Detectives have interviewed the student and taken a statement,” UCSD police said in a release. “The investigation is ongoing as we continue to identify and interview witnesses.”

After Thursday’s discovery, hundreds of people joined a campus rally to oppose racial intolerance. “It’s OK to feel hurt and angry about this,” said one participant. “We’ve been silent for too long.”

The set up is so perfect you almost expect Leslie Nielsen to stick his head in the chancellor’s office and say, “I just want to tell you both good luck. We’re all counting on you.”

The offending noose clearly wasn’t placed there by a white male. Had it been, we could expect his name, age, photo, and known attendance at a local Tea Party protest to have been broadcast along with the condemnations of intolerance. In fact, I’d go so far as to say it was almost certainly a black student – and we already know it was a “she”.

It wouldn’t be surprising to find out “she” was rather active in campus identity politics either.

On Friday, the school announced several measures it was taking in response to recommendations from its Black Student Union. They include the establishment of a task force on minority faculty recruitment, a new commission to addressing declining African-American enrollment and finding space for an African-American resource center.

“I want to emphasize these are the initial steps, and I realize we have a lot of work ahead of us,” Fox said.

The noose incident occurred two weeks after Black History Month was mocked in an off-campus party that was condemned by the school.

It’s unclear how long the student is suspended for.

Way to take one for the team. She gets a one day suspension and no mention of the incident on her transcripts/record and the Black Student Union gets a gaggle of its recommendations enacted as a result of her ginned up controversy.

Did you hear about the controversy at UCSD?

At UCSD? What is it?

It’s a publicly-funded university where political correctness and identity politics are valued over practical knowledge and rational discussion, but that’s not important right now.

Update: “It’s unclear how long the student is suspended for.” Nice grammar there multiple-layers-of-fact-checking-and-editing-mainstream-media-member CNN. Let me fix that for you – It is unclear for how long the student is suspended. I’d wager the person who wrote that sentence went to a school a whole lot like UCSD…

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