A terrible affliction is sweeping the nation today. A condition that is so shameful, that almost no one can bring themselves to even say it aloud. But here at Wizbang, we are sturdy souls, we are hardy and hearty, and we will do that which others fear to do: we shall speak (well, type) the name of this dread disease:
Sudden Jihadi Syndrome.
This is that terrible illness that strikes completely at random, when perfectly normal, peace-loving, tolerant Muslims and drives them into committing horrific feats of terror.
One such sufferer is 25=year-old Mohammed Taheri-Azar, who was living out a calm, routine, uneventful life when he was suddenly afflicted with SJS and drove his SUV into a pedestrian area at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, hoping to kill as many infidels as he could before he himself was, in turn, struck down by police.
Fortunately, one of the side-effects of SJS is gross incompetence. Mr. Taheri-Azar not only didn’t manage to kill anyone (except, indirectly, through the horrific carbon emissions of his Gaea-killing SUV), but he was captured by police without incident after the attack.
Well, Mr. Taheri-Azar has faced American justice. Instead of getting the treatment he so greatly needs, he will be a guest of the North Carolina penal system for the next three decades or so.
This is intolerable. Mr. Taheri-Azar isn’t a criminal, he’s a victim. He suffers from a dread disease, and he needs treatment, not incarceration.
It might be too late for him, but there are literally millions of other Muslims in America who could fall subject to this horrific, inhuman ailment. They need to be aware of it, and seek treatment at the first symptom.
And we are all complacent in keeping this condition in the dark, treating it like it’s some terrible stigma, some mark of Cain. We need to expose it, because sunlight is, indeed, the best disinfectant.
Note how the Boston Globe and the AP try to hide the true nature of Mr. Taheri-Azar’s plight, in the very penultimate paragraph:
The letter (that Taheri left in his aparment, as he expected to be killed in his rampage) said he wanted revenge for the deaths of Muslims overseas that he attributed to actions by the United States.
Muslims, don’t be ashamed. SJS can strike at any time, with little or no warning. Get yourself tested regularly for signs of SJS, and seek help if you start feeling the urge to kill non-Muslims over perceived slights, beheading those who you think insult Islam, or feel the urge to kill random Americans because of what some other Americans might have done to some other Muslim somewhere in the world.
Let us rip the veil off this disease, yank off its headscarf, strip away its chador, banish its burqa, cast aside its kaffiyeh. Let us all unite to confront and defeat this terrible affliction.
It’s too late for Mr. Taheri-Azar. Don’t let it be too late for you, too.