It’s Friday, which means it’s time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. Enter your best caption for the following picture:
Winners will be announced Monday morning.
Update: Winners announced. Click the link to read the winning entries. The contest is now closed.
Barack is presented the German version of a white elephant.
“Using this switch, the bear can say ‘Yes we can’ in English, Spanish and German. However, we’re not aware of an equivalent phrase in French.”
Obama’s reply:
If Obama’s holding it you can be certain it’s not a Hubble Humble figurine
‘This is a scale model which will be part of the rotunda in my Presidential Library which is now being constructed. Which coincidentally, contributions are now being accepted.”
‘We had considered a ‘Golden Calf’, but Michelle insisted on the ‘Platinum Bear’ instead.
Don’t vorry. It vill get darker. Itz meerschaum!
“This pathetic bear might as well have written that dumbass speech you just gave.”
“We wanted a suitable symbol for you, Senator.
Expensive yet fragile, powerful in image if not in substance, and of course you can change its meaning while telling everyone you are being consistent.”
“An expensive empty trinket for an expensive empty suit!”
“I Got One In Every Room, They are Smoke Detectors.”
And here is a model of my civilian defense force. You see, if we use bears then people won’t need guns and no one will want to invade us.
“Jessie Jackson Gave It To Me, It’s A Nut Cracker.”
“Yeah, I got one of these in Mexico. Press down here, and oil comes out.”
Not even a teleprompter could help Obama out of this one!
..vhut you see Obama, zumtimes za bear is just za bear…
It’s not just the late night guys who are having trouble making jokes about Obie – Wizbang’s top Caption Contest Contestants are equally stymied.
Obama removed the bear’s tiny Coca-Cola bottle – too American.
So this is a bear. Nice. We have bears in Illinois. I even backed legislation to see that they were afforded equal rights and fair housing while on the senate banking committee, with several representatives from the other 57 states.
Klaus: Would you like another schnitzengruben?
Barack: No, thank you. Fifteen is my limit on schnitzengruben.
I understand your aides take foreign policy advice from Winnie the Pooh. Because I’m a grown-up this is the only bear I could find lying around.
Obama: Mr. Mayor, I think you misunderstood when I said I wanted to come to Berlin and get a tiny white doll that was a bear…
“…and it’s hollow inside so you can hide your stash from the SS”
“Cool Beans you goose-steppin’ Aryan”
“Give me a fist-bump my Chocolate Brother”
“…and this is my Nobel prize for lowering the seas and thus saving the polar bear…”
When the need is great, leave this by the window and the Gaia League will come to your aid!
“It’s actually a bar of soap. When you wash your hands with it, the slow melting symbolizes the polar climate shift.”
“Vee ver goink to giff you an eagle, but I understand you consider zat too pro-American and warlike …”
” Did Jesse Jackson give you this bear? Cuz it looks like his testicles have been removed?”
This handy little unit is the Bear of Prevarication +2. With this little guy on the podium you gain the trust of all media personnel in the room and they automatically believe and broadcast your every utterance to your greatest advantage. If you speak “inartfully” you get a +2 on your save credibility roll and an automatic dump of Wikepedia and Google caches.
What you already have one of these?! That damn Gnome LIED to me. He said Bill Clinton had the only other one in existence.
This is the bear my uncle received from the Soviets for helping to liberate Aushwitz.
“When Barack Obama was in the Alps,
Fighting polar bears,
He used his magical fire breath,
And saved the maidens fair.
“So what would Barack Obama do
If he were here today?
I’m sure he’d kick an ass or two,
That’s what Barack Obama’d do.”
“Mr. Obama, it is a nice statue, but must you sing about yourself in the third person? And the way the reporters all leaped in on the chorus… creepy.”
“… and he holds the toilet paper roll on a spindle between his paws — in Germany we call that Forbearpoopin“
Obama: So, is that a bear in your pants or are you just enjoying my speech?
A Kodiak Moment
Mayor: Is it true how zey say zat you people are… gifted?
[Lights go out, sound of zipper opening]
Mayor: Oh. It’s twue. It’s twue. It’s twue, it’s twue!
So Senator Obama, let me get this straight: This is all that’s left of the polar ice caps. Here in your office. At room temperature. Holding down your stacks of ACORN registration forms…
Hey, this bear is white! That’s racist!
Obama: “Bear with me for a moment.. the teleprompter’s down so I don’t know my response”.
Wow, you mean to say you spent years sculpting this thing from nothing but bull excrement and hot air, then whitewashed it to make it look like something of substance? OK, but what about the bear statue?
I’m only showing you this to distract you from the fact that my name backwards is “I… I am a BOKC Arab.”
I was given this by the Sierra Club for preserving the home of the Polar Bear. It’s made from the boiled down cartilage of 1255 polar bears.
… and now ve vish to present Mr. Barack Hussein Obama mit the European Union’s “Most Bearish on America” award for 2008!
Think this bear will fit under that bus?
This one has a “meadow fresh” cartrige, but you can refill it with the scent of your choice. I recommend one in every room. And each bathroom.
Mayor: The first rule of Bear Club is – you do not talk about Bear Club. The second rule of Bear Club is – you DO NOT talk about Bear Club
Another Obama photo-op: unBEARable.
“The Bear Is Made Out Of Recycled Beer Foam.”
“The Bear Comes In Limburger Or A Sassy German Brie.”
“Putin Left It In The Bathtub, It Floats.”
Senator Obama holds a symbol of what the stock market will be like if he becomes President.
If you don’t know what a bear market is, then you will if Obama becomes President.