A long time ago, I was in a training class when the instructor brought up oxymorons. He tossed out the standard examples — jumbo shrimp, pretty ugly, military intelligence, and so on. I offered my personal favorite:
I got a gold star for that one.
Anyway, I think I now have one that puts even that one to shame:
Because if there’s one Society that is utterly inimical to thought, to debate, to inquisition, to challenging fundamental precepts, to making breakthroughs, it has to be Islam.
I seem to recall one Islamic “scholar” who said that all books besides the Koran were useless. They fell into two categories: those that supported the Koran, and were therefore redundant, and those that contradicted the Koran, and were therefore blasphemous.
I also don’t recall any contributions to the world of knowledge that came from Islam in the last thousand years or so.
Well, that’s not fair. They’ve shown the world such things as “the affects on the human body by nails and rat poison propelled by high explosives,” “the proper way to behead someone on video,” “how to slice off a clitoris with an unsterilized razor blade.”
Islam’s specialty, it seems, is taking things invented by others and using them for truly hideous purposes. They didn’t invent the suicide bomber, but they made it into an art form. They didn’t invent the AK-47, but they loved it so much Hezbollah uses it on their flag. They didn’t invent female genital mutilation (I’m sorry, “female circumcision”), but they are the biggest pushers of it today. They didn’t discover oil or all its uses, but they certainly revel in their possession of it.
It’s somewhat appropriate. Islam itself is a derivative faith. One sociopathic, pedophilic lunatic took the tenets of Judaism and Christianity and grafted his own psychoses on top of it, instantly demoting the other two faiths as subsidiary, incomplete, and sadly lacking.
So much of Islam — and the culture that goes with it — seems built on insecurity. Anything that is holy or sacred to another faith instantly must be topped. Jerusalem is the Holy City to Jews and Christians? Why, it is also sacred to Muslims, even though it is never once mentioned in the Koran. Christians hold Sunday as their holy day, and the Jews Saturday? Why, our holy day is Friday, before theirs!
The Muslims are also the only people today who explicitly prescribe the death penalty for things such as heresy and apostasy — saying things that contradict Islam, and leaving the faith. In both cases, it’s simple thuggery — you WILL NOT question us, or we will put you to death.
So, “Islamic Thinkers?”
That’s a pretty good one. Even funnier than “guest host” and even more obscene than “UN Peacekeepers.”