Clinton Crime Cabal II: The Electric Bugaloo

Just recently I realized that I better not give up the day job, because there is no way in hell I’d ever get a position in a Hillary Rodham Clinton administration. Apart from the obvious ideological disagreements, I simply lack certain key credentials: I’ve never been convicted of anything, let alone arrested.

Let’s review a few key people behind Hillary’s campaign:

Bill Clinton: agreed to disbarment (forfeiture of his license to practice law) by the state of Arkansas and the United States Supreme Court in exchange for the dropping of federal charges of perjury.

Norman Hsu, “Hillraiser”: Prominent fundraiser who helped put almost a million dollars in Hillary Clinton’s warchest while a fugitive following a 1992 fraud conviction. Then, when out on bail (?!) for those charges, fled again only to be arrested on a train in Colorado, heading for Chicago. Now suspected of running a Ponzi scheme that bilked at least 40 million dollars from victims.

Sandy Berger, former National Security Advisor: Pleaded guilty to stealing and destroying documents from the National Archives. Stripped of his security clearance for three years. (Which expires less than two months before the 2008 presidential election — a coincidence, I’m sure.) Chose to surrender his license to practice law rather than explain his actions under oath. To date, has not given any explanation for his actions under oath, each and every time choosing to accept whatever punishment was proffered at the time. (If any case called out for a full congressional investigation, including a grant of transactional immunity in exchange for testimony under oath, it would be this one — because that’s probably the only way we might get the whole story from Sandy Berger. Here’s a man who was entrusted with the highest secrets of our government repeatedly stealing documents from the National Archives, hiding them in publicly-accessible places including under a construction trailer, retrieving them later, and then throwing them away — and we still have absolutely no idea what his motives were or what he was trying to achieve.) Anyway, Berger is one of Clinton’s top advisors on foreign policy.

I find myself wondering if a young Hillary Rodham didn’t pay attention during an English literature class while they were studying Yeats. Somehow the phrase “the best lack all conviction” and it stuck with her, but completely out of context — and now she thinks on a subconscious level that a criminal conviction — especially in a political context — somehow adds to a person’s worthiness for public trust. Perhaps she even ties in the phrase with its source, the poem “The Second Coming,” and associates it with her return to the White House.

OK, that’s one hell of a stretch, I’ll admit. But the only other explanation I can see for her bringing Berger into her circle of advisors is as a payoff for him taking the fall for the Clintons. I’ve often read the theory that Berger was attempting to destroy evidence that would have painted the Clinton administration in a bad light before the 9/11 Commission, and his conduct after the fact was aimed not at saving himself, but avoiding to have to offer any explanation for his deeds under oath. Loyalty of this magnitude does not come readily, and an offer of a future position of power and trust would do much to compel it — enough to make fines and public disgrace bearable.

But that’s just crazy talk, wild and unfounded theories and smears straight from the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy That’s Out To Destroy America (tm HRC). I think I’ll stick with the Yeats theory. It’s a lot less likely to get me in trouble.

Hsu Strings
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