At the risk of taking something utterly mindless and irrelevant way too seriously, I felt the need to revisit the case of Miss Teen USA South Carolina Lauren Caitlin Upton who had what will probably go down in history as the most extreme blonde moment in history.
In a way, she’s a victim. Any fair look at her answer shows she got mired in liberal taking points.
Pageant questions for the last 30 years are just fluff designed to extract from the young girl her liberal qualifications. So young girls practice spouting liberal buzz phrases, no matter the question.– Because looking good isn’t enough to win a beauty parent, you must have the proper liberal credentials, or there’s no sparkly tiara for you!
Remember the questions was, why couldn’t one-fifth of Americans locate our country on a world map. Let’s break down her answer:
I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uh, some people out there in our nation don’t have maps
Everybody is a victim. The first rule of being a good liberal is to find a way to say these hapless morons who can’t find the U.S. on a map aren’t really morons, they are victims… Victims of the map deficit. The map deficit grew under Reagan, got better under Clinton but has exploded under George Bush. “We should have a program” so everyone can get a map.
and, uh, I believe that our education like such as in South Africa
And this is where her coaching really kicked in. Mention the poor people of South Africa. No matter the question, South Africa MUST be in the stock pageant answer.
and, uh, the Iraq
and what good is a good liberal answer without the word Iraq in it?
everywhere like, such as and I believe that they should, our education over here in the U.S.
(pageantbot) Education, must speak about education…. OK in fairness, education really should be part of a reasonable answer but by this point, she can’t even tell you the question, she’s just trying to hit the liberal talking points.
should help
EVERY pageant answer is required to have a call for someone being helped. Because we all know this “help” is a liberal codeword meaning tax increases and income redistribution.
the U.S., er, should help South Africa
Of course we should honey. You’ve been practicing that line for a year, it was going to come out no matter the question.
and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries
Because being a good liberal means we care about all the dark people.
so we will be able to build up our future for our children.
Because it takes a village to raise a moron.
Her coaching did her in. She was told no matter the question, mention victims, Iraq, South Africa and education. In her zeal to prove herself liberal enough to wear the Miss Teen USA sash and crown, she made a fool of herself. Not unlike other liberals just this time it was more obvious.