A Friend Indeed, Part I

For some reason, I tend to inspire trust in people. I apparently have this “vibe” that makes people trust me.

I have two examples going on right now.

My best friend, “Jay Paparazzo,” is seeking to get a security clearance for his job. As some of you no doubt know, this involves contacting longtime friends and acquaintances for information. And since he and I have been friends for over 20 years, he put me on his list.

I got a call from the investigator assigned his case the other day. (Names changed to protect… well, me.)

“Hello, this is Jay Tea?”

“Yes, it is.”

My name is Lucy Aspen, and I’m conducting a background investigation on Jay Paparazzo. He said you would be willing to answer some questions.”

“Oh, absolutely. Do you want to hear about the drug use, the violence, the bizarre sexual habits, or the animal abuse?”

After a brief pause, she answered cheerfully. “Why, all of them, of course!”

“That’s great, because they all kind of tie together.”

The things I do to for my friends…

This was actually the second call I’d fielded for JP. The first interview lasted about 15 minutes. I mentioned this to the lady who called this time, who was surprised to hear about it and wondered if there had been an error in asking for this second interview. It turned out that it was an oversight, and I wasn’t called to fabricate about my friend’s alleged vices. And it looks like he might not only get the clearance, but a very nice promotion as well.

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