Just when you thought it was safe to go back to ignoring Ted Kennedy…

Ted Kennedy has, over the course of his grotesque life, has been tainted by nearly every scandal imaginable. Booze, infidelity, lasciviousness, hypocrisy, venality, dishonesty — the litany is the stuff of legends. But now our own modern Falstaff has finally broken that final barrier:

He’s apparently got a “love child” of his very own, too.

Teddy’s “youthful indiscretion” apparently happened way back in 1983 or so, while he was still married to his first wife, Joan Kennedy. (You remember Joan — last Thanksgiving, when families traditionally come together, she was found drunk and passed out on the streets, with a broken shoulder.) Three years after his joke of a run for the presidency, shortly after his 50th birthday, Ted took up with a much-younger Cape Cod woman named Caroline Bilodeau, and the two had a grand old time.

Right up until the rabbit died.

Ms. Bilodeau resisted Teddy’s pressure to “get rid of it,” the Enquirer reports, and the two eventually parted ways. The Kennedys helped her financially, and she eventually married another man, who adopted young Christopher.

Yeah, I know, it’s the Enquirer. But over the last decade or so, that paper has had a track record for accuracy that outshines the New York Times.

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