Pulling a boner

24 Comments

1. Red May 17, 2005

   “negligent sexual intercourse”

   What must trying this case have been like? There must have been some great read backs. This is a perfect example of there is a lawyer out there that is willing to take any case and use any defense.
2. Mays May 17, 2005

   I hate you
3. wavemaker May 17, 2005

   Beat me to it Red. This is the sort of case where the plaintiff’s lawyer makes me ashamed to be part of the profession. Perhaps if he had been the one on top, he could have sued himself and recovered under his own homeowner’s policy! Don’t laugh — spouses frequently sue one another for automobile accidents that result in injury to the non-driving party — and they recover, all the time.
4. McGehee May 17, 2005

   The idea that it hurts I could deal with — but the fact you can hear it happen…

   <swoon>
5. bullwinkle May 17, 2005

   http://www.freepatentsonline.com/4653484.html
6. bullwinkle May 17, 2005

   I was laughing so hard I forgot to add that there are weenie splints available for just such an emergency. I wonder if it has red cross on it…….
7. bullwinkle May 17, 2005

   This one has everything he needs, including a popsicle stick and the ever important red cross.

   http://www.a1partysupply.com/detail/7/13169/11/10/PECKER-FIRST-AID-KIT.html
8. Am I A Pundit Now? May 17, 2005

   ‘Fracture’ and ‘penis’ are two words that should NEVER go together.

   **shudder**
9. fatman May 17, 2005

   I will never have sex again.
10. physics geek May 17, 2005

    Thanks. Now I’m going to have nightmares.
11. wavemaker May 17, 2005

    Bullwinkle’s links crack me up — you have them bookmarked for “special occasions,” do you?
12. Earl May 17, 2005

    “Dangerous Weapon”?? in what context can that Judge decide that this guy was,or was not being assaulted by a dangerous weapon?
13. tacitblue May 17, 2005

    “striking the symphysis pubis, the female pelvic bone, just missing the vaginal opening, and creating a sudden bending. A loud snap and excruciating pain always follows”

    “although I have personally seen cases of a fractured penis that resulted when a man rolled on top of an erect penis while sleeping.”

    I Will Never Sleep Again!
14. NewEnglandDevil May 17, 2005

    “One cannot, as a matter of public policy, consent to becoming a victim of an assault and battery by means of a dangerous weapon in the course of a sexual relationship,” the court concluded.

    Honest question. What if he had said he was raped, starting the moment she moved her feet? Am I wrong that current rape law suggests that consent can be withdrawn at any time? How would this affect *real* consent/rape trials if it was established as precedent?

    Thanks…

    NED
15. Don May 17, 2005

    …and don’t do a Google image search (GIS) for “penile fracture”…trust me.

    Stop…really…don’t do it.

    I warned you.
16. Don May 17, 2005

    …and don’t do a Google image search (GIS) for “penile fracture”…you don’t want to see it.

    No…don’t do it…really.

    I warned you.
17. Will Franklin May 17, 2005

    ouch
18. Macker May 17, 2005

    So much for putting her in the Buck….
19. reelcobra May 17, 2005

    Now I know what a “Wizbang” is.
20. McGehee May 17, 2005

    I’ve been saying “ow” all day for no apparent reason. Coming back to this thread reminded me why.
21. McGehee May 17, 2005

    …ow
22. BlogDog May 17, 2005

    It is a maxim that hard cases makes bad law.

    Personally, I wonder if Mr. “Doe’s” first name is actually Benedict. For that matter, it might have been better to call him ‘John D’Oh!’
23. t. z. May 17, 2005

    Having surgically corrected a few of these, it is my opinion that it occurs when having sex with a penis 2 inches shorter than you think it is.

    That being said, a google search will produce an article from Iran, in which the majority of injuries are from falling down?!

    TZ
24. Greg May 18, 2005

    Ow. Ow, ow, ow, ow. That is so wrong. Thanks, Jay. Now I’m going to have nightmares tonight. Joy.