No good deed goes unpunished

I was thrilled when I saw Kevin’s Christmas Bunny contest. I figured it was a good chance to score some loot. Then I read the fine print — “Current authors or sponsors of Wizbang (and their families) are not eligible.”

Fine, then. Be that way. I don’t care. I learned a long time ago that being kind to strangers can come back and bite you on the can. I’m posting my cautionary tale in the extended section.


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A little while ago I saw a friend of mine on a Monday morning. He had one hell of a shiner.

“Dave,” I asked him, “what the hell happened to your eye?”

“I was in church Sunday morning, like always. At one point we all stood up. That’s when I noticed that the lady in front of me had her dress caught in the crack of her butt. It didn’t look too comfortable, so I leaned forward and pulled it out. Then her husband turned around and slugged me.”

“Well, no wonder, Dave! Don’t EVER do anything like that again!”

“Oh, don’t worry, Jay. I won’t.”

The next Monday I saw Dave again, and he had ANOTHER shiner.

“Dave, didn’t you learn the first time? I told you not to do that again!”

“I didn’t, I swear!”

“Then what happened?”

“I went to church, just like before. The same couple sat right in front of me. Then, when we had to stand, I noticed her dress was caught in her butt again.”

“And you pulled it out again, didn’t you?”

“No! I left it alone, just like you said I should.”

“Then what happened?”

“Her husband reached over and pulled it out for her. But I knew she liked it that way, so I leaned forward and put it back.”

(OK, I know it’s an old joke, but at least I found a way to make it topical…)

Weekend Caption Contest™
Grease 2: Electric Boogalo


  1. julie December 24, 2004
  2. Laurence Simon December 24, 2004
  3. Smoke Eater December 24, 2004
  4. firstbrokenangel December 26, 2004
  5. firstbrokenangel December 26, 2004