This evening, when I got home, I found my apartment mate (also heterosexual male) had left a flyer on the kitchen table.
“Caring for your new genital piercing”
Crud, there goes my appetite for the evening…
Even grosser update beneath the fold:
It gets worse. Lifting up the toilet seat and seeing what appears to be a blood-stained paper towel in the bowl. I could not flush fast enough…
Update 2, upon waking 5 hours later: TWICE. Seeing the exact same thing AGAIN. Nathan, are you a lawyer? More importantly, will you be my lawyer?