EXCLUSIVE: Draft of Kerry Concession Speech

WIZBANG EXCLUSIVE: Via a “little birdie,” Wizbang has an exclusive on the first draft of the Kerry concession speech:

I called the President this morning, and I told that incompetent liar, that the harsh rhetoric was out of hand. This was a time for healing and that we now had to deal with important issues, like the war he mislead us into.

I told him that while we disagreed on his taking food out of the mouths of hungry babies to give it to his fat cat friends at Halliburton, it was time to bring the county together.

We had a good talk about the fact that he killed Christopher Reeve and I how if I were President he’d still be making superman movies.

I told him just because he was dumb and I was smarter than him, I was not bitter about losing the election even though we all knew he stole this one and the last one down in Florida.

We also spoke about how he is dividing America with his harsh rhetoric like “Freedom is on the march” and “We need to support emerging Democracies.”

So my friends, this part of our fight is over. But we’ll keep fighting the assholes, have no fear. I know they’re a bunch of stupid hicks who voted for Bush but now is not the time to talk about that. Now is a time of unity.

So let’s work to bring the country together and start the healing process. I told the president he needed to work with us to heal the country. Even if we all know he’ll fuck it up like he fucked up Iraq.

Good thing Bob Shrum rewrote it.

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