"Hey Buddy, Pull My Finger"
About The Author
Kevin
Kevin founded Wizbang in 2003. He still contributes occasionally and handles all the technical and design work for the site.
Kevin founded Wizbang in 2003. He still contributes occasionally and handles all the technical and design work for the site.
“Say, bartender, is there a Kinko’s in this village? My aide here needs to send another fax.”
Buy that french ambasador a beer at the end there. I know he’ll convince his government to back me when I’m president… Oh yeah, this gentlemen here is from Germany, and although he doesn’t like american beer, I’ll buy him one anyways.
*After a brief phone call*
I’ve changed my mind about it. I don’t want to buy these gentlemen any beer. I just heard that their respective governments won’t support me as much as they should when I become President… Though I may change my mind again in the near future on this subject.
“How did I get here? Well, it had been a long night of cards and drinking. Clinton says with the bypass that he bet he could do a Lambert Leap. Then Gore says he invented the Lambert Leap. McAuliffe says he’s got the Jaegermeister. Carville screams ROADTRIP. Next thing I know I wake up over there with nothing on but a BEARS STILL SUCK T-shirt, my ass shaved, and a chicken duct taped to my head.”
“Barkeep, could you go tell OneDrummer and Maharichie to get a room, I’m tryin’ to watch the game. “
Barkeep, don’t cut him off before he signs this absentee ballot.
So I says to Schmitty, “Schmitty, they oughtta hold a Presidential elocution once. Just ONCE! ‘Nucular’ my Brahmin ass!”
Earth To OneDrummer…Wow that was the most Girleymanish diatribe I have ever read.
Now listen closely…Take the ladies panties off your head…smack yourself in the face…AND BE A MAN!!
MahaRinkiedinkperformer…
Somewhere a birthday party is missing its clown.
I have only one position on this . I will push in this common man’s stool with this finger, then I will push in the stool of all my fellow americans. (Except Michael Moore, the memory of his stool is seared, seared in my mind when I inserted my head up his ass during the convention)
“Okay, last time. What’s got two thumbs and likes blowjobs? You ready? This guy over here.”