“Hey Phil?” said Jed
“Yeah Jed?” answered Phil
“Why we doing this again?” said Jed to Phil
“I don’t remember.” Said Phil to Jed.
“Oh, ok just checking.” said Jed
DarbyApril 23, 2004
Announcer 1: Today we will be announcing the grand champion of the highly popular, wet and cold nose competition.
Announcer 2: As you can see the four contenders have steped up to the offical wet and cold nose wall, our judges shall be along shortly.
Announcer 1: As you can see, the competition is going to be fierce, they’re all standing there perfectly still, behavior IS a deciding factor in winning this prestegious award.
I was alright with the metal detectors and the physical searches, but when they installed the “Crotch Check” at the ticket counter, I descided to write my congressman.
“Eenie, meenie, mynie, mose,
Catch a doggie by his nose…”
J.
Jay TeaApril 23, 2004
After extensive animal testing, the Schnozz Snipper was rejected for human use. The only one spared from the scrap heap can currently be found at Michael Jackson’s surgeon’s office.
J.
Jay TeaApril 23, 2004
Shown above: the Defense Department’s Fixed Mounting version of Gary Larson’s “Dobie-O-Matic,” as shown in “The Far Side.”
J.
Jay TeaApril 23, 2004
Of course, NOW I find a link to the “Dobie-O-Matic” cartoon…
“You people have sick minds, calling it a doggie-gloryhole. It’s just a simple piece of veterinary equipment. Jeez, they have to have something to hold them in place while they milk them.”
Jay TeaApril 24, 2004
“OK, ma’am, they can’t see you. Can you identify which dog shoved his nose into your crotch?”
J.
Jay TeaApril 24, 2004
Many people say the final straw in Michael Eisner’s reign at Disney was when he greenlighted remaking “Porky’s” with dogs. Shown above: a clip from the infamous “girl’s shower room” scene.
J.
PC TutorApril 24, 2004
Tonight, we take a rare glimpse into the mysterious world of Synchronized Sniffing. These Olympic hopefuls with share the thrill of victory and the agony of the fleas. Put down the remote, Sparkey – you won’t wanna miss this.
We’re not sure what Leonardo DaVinci was thinking when he designed this, but after building a working model we believe it is some sort of time-saving farm equipment.
Jay TeaApril 24, 2004
All your nose are belong to us!
J.
webgostApril 24, 2004
The Pentagon today revealed the first photos of UBL
Jay TeaApril 25, 2004
For the love of god, don’t ANYONE pull Rodney’s finger until we get our noses out of here!
“Hey Phil?” said Jed
“Yeah Jed?” answered Phil
“Why we doing this again?” said Jed to Phil
“I don’t remember.” Said Phil to Jed.
“Oh, ok just checking.” said Jed
Announcer 1: Today we will be announcing the grand champion of the highly popular, wet and cold nose competition.
Announcer 2: As you can see the four contenders have steped up to the offical wet and cold nose wall, our judges shall be along shortly.
Announcer 1: As you can see, the competition is going to be fierce, they’re all standing there perfectly still, behavior IS a deciding factor in winning this prestegious award.
Future Sprint PCS commercial:
“I said bake a danish casserole, not make a doggy glory hole.”
For security reasons, prisoners at Doggie Guantanamo will be detained until the perp who took a dump on the White House lawn is given up.
Today we bring you rarely seen pictures from the secret Milk-bone testing labs.
“Oh, you want a measuring contest? I’ll give you a measuring contest!”
The American Kennel Society announces the standards for the newest recognized breed: The San Francisco Gloryhound.
DAMMIT, other people beat me to my ideas before I could get to a computer!
Oh, what the hell…
“Tonight, on Fox News: the shocking truth about what goes on inside San Francisco doggie bathhouses!”
“Shown above: some of the approximately 200 Afghan hounds being held as illegal combatants in kennels at Camp Guantanamo.”
J.
I was alright with the metal detectors and the physical searches, but when they installed the “Crotch Check” at the ticket counter, I descided to write my congressman.
Hot canines lined up at the Glory Hole Kennel.
I’m Rick James, Bitch! er… I mean bitches!
“Eenie, meenie, mynie, mose,
Catch a doggie by his nose…”
J.
After extensive animal testing, the Schnozz Snipper was rejected for human use. The only one spared from the scrap heap can currently be found at Michael Jackson’s surgeon’s office.
J.
Shown above: the Defense Department’s Fixed Mounting version of Gary Larson’s “Dobie-O-Matic,” as shown in “The Far Side.”
J.
Of course, NOW I find a link to the “Dobie-O-Matic” cartoon…
J.
Rex: “These damm glory holes! Hey you, you with the studded collar. Yea, your the one, I wanna sniff that gorgeous French Poodle arse!”
Spot: “You always did have that foreign fetish.”
Captain, the doggie sneezers are in position and ready to fire!
Little known fact: After King Louis and Marie Antionette were beheaded, the French peasants benosed their prized bloodhounds.
Today the 9/11 Commission held a secret session with four of former President Clinton’s interns…
Fun New Caption Contest
http://hstrial-ddiak.homestead.com/Feedback_Form.html
‘In a blind sniff test, 3 out of 4 dogs agree: Michael Moore smells like an ass.”
“You people have sick minds, calling it a doggie-gloryhole. It’s just a simple piece of veterinary equipment. Jeez, they have to have something to hold them in place while they milk them.”
“OK, ma’am, they can’t see you. Can you identify which dog shoved his nose into your crotch?”
J.
Many people say the final straw in Michael Eisner’s reign at Disney was when he greenlighted remaking “Porky’s” with dogs. Shown above: a clip from the infamous “girl’s shower room” scene.
J.
Tonight, we take a rare glimpse into the mysterious world of Synchronized Sniffing. These Olympic hopefuls with share the thrill of victory and the agony of the fleas. Put down the remote, Sparkey – you won’t wanna miss this.
We’re not sure what Leonardo DaVinci was thinking when he designed this, but after building a working model we believe it is some sort of time-saving farm equipment.
All your nose are belong to us!
J.
The Pentagon today revealed the first photos of UBL
For the love of god, don’t ANYONE pull Rodney’s finger until we get our noses out of here!
(SOMEBODY had to do it…)
J.