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It's Friday, which means it's time for the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest™. This week there are two contests, one for a Bush photo and one for a Kerry photo.
Winners will be announced Sunday.
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Comments (66)
"I'll never hesitate to def... (Below threshold)1. Posted by kelley | October 29, 2004 10:57 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"I'll never hesitate to defend America...as you can see from the ass-whupping I just put on this pumpkin."
1. Posted by kelley | October 29, 2004 10:57 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 10:57
2. Posted by Attwood | October 29, 2004 11:02 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"This is what the flag will look like if Ohio doesn't swing for Bush/Cheney."
2. Posted by Attwood | October 29, 2004 11:02 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:02
3. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 29, 2004 11:05 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"...And whoever can carve me a perfect likeness of John (Gomer Pyle) Kerry, and John (pretty boy) Edwards, gets to be Secretary of Agriculture."
3. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 29, 2004 11:05 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:05
4. Posted by Boyd | October 29, 2004 11:11 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
And now for the Special Halloween Edition of my Gallagher impression...
You in the white hat...watch out!
4. Posted by Boyd | October 29, 2004 11:11 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:11
5. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 29, 2004 11:12 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Screw that Gin and Raisin crap, Pumpkin-jack will cure what ail's ya."
5. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 29, 2004 11:12 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:12
6. Posted by Troll | October 29, 2004 11:15 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"And another thing about my opponent... HEEEEEE'S A BOWL OF SQUASH!"
6. Posted by Troll | October 29, 2004 11:15 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:15
7. Posted by Kieth | October 29, 2004 11:17 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
My opponent will outlaw pumpkin carving... PUMPKIN CARVING. We need a constitutional amendment...
7. Posted by Kieth | October 29, 2004 11:17 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:17
8. Posted by The WASP | October 29, 2004 11:26 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
These pumkins were taken by special opps last night from one of the Kerry mansions.. as you can see the staff carved a W in one proving that working people in America support me, even those that work for the Kerry's..
8. Posted by The WASP | October 29, 2004 11:26 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:26
9. Posted by The WASP | October 29, 2004 11:29 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
last night we stole pupmkins from the Kerry mansion tonight we TP the Edwards estate!!!!!
9. Posted by The WASP | October 29, 2004 11:29 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:29
10. Posted by IChaplain | October 29, 2004 11:29 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Sure, my opponent's head is bigger. But as you can see my head has a message.
10. Posted by IChaplain | October 29, 2004 11:29 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:29
11. Posted by SteveL | October 29, 2004 11:30 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"I see that Ted Kennedy seems to have left his head here on the stage."
11. Posted by SteveL | October 29, 2004 11:30 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:30
12. Posted by Laurence Simon | October 29, 2004 11:30 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"And just to prove I'm serious, here's my replacements for Powell and Boucher in 2005."
12. Posted by Laurence Simon | October 29, 2004 11:30 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:30
13. Posted by Macker | October 29, 2004 11:30 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"See folks...just like the 509th Composite Group did for practice in World War II, we'll drop these PUMPKINS on Iran and North Korea first before we hit 'em with THE REAL THING!"
13. Posted by Macker | October 29, 2004 11:30 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:30
14. Posted by MichaelW | October 29, 2004 11:37 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Bush v. Gourd 2004
14. Posted by MichaelW | October 29, 2004 11:37 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:37
15. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 29, 2004 11:42 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
George Bush thanked his lucky stars that he had resolved his issues with Dick Cheney's daughter, but now he still struggled with his own personal demons and was forced to weigh the political ramifications as it slowly dawned on him that he had scheduled a campaign stop in a Hay Bar
15. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 29, 2004 11:42 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:42
16. Posted by Sam Baskinger | October 29, 2004 11:54 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Our efforts to spread democracy and freedom have most recently liberated these two gords from a fate involving an oven of mass convection. Monday my administration will ask the UN security council to impose sanctions on farmer brown.
16. Posted by Sam Baskinger | October 29, 2004 11:54 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:54
17. Posted by Rick Holte | October 29, 2004 11:55 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"And I invite Y'all to join me in the pumpkin patch Saturday night as we await the arrival of the The Great Pumpkin! Who's with me?"
17. Posted by Rick Holte | October 29, 2004 11:55 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:55
18. Posted by Sam Baskinger | October 29, 2004 11:56 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Our efforts to spread democracy and freedom have most recently liberated these two gords from a fate involving an oven of mass convection. Monday my administration will ask the UN security council to impose sanctions on farmer brown.
18. Posted by Sam Baskinger | October 29, 2004 11:56 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:56
19. Posted by Sam Baskinger | October 29, 2004 11:57 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Our efforts to spread democracy and freedom have most recently liberated these two gords from a fate involving an oven of mass convection. Monday my administration will ask the UN security council to impose sanctions on farmer brown.
19. Posted by Sam Baskinger | October 29, 2004 11:57 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 11:57
20. Posted by chthus | October 29, 2004 12:03 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I carved the littler punkin with the smiley face, and my opponent didn't even show up to carve his. Who you gonna vote for?
20. Posted by chthus | October 29, 2004 12:03 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 12:03
21. Posted by Rance | October 29, 2004 12:08 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"I'm so glad to be here today, and proud to share be sharing the podium with the Vice President and Senator Zell Miller."
21. Posted by Rance | October 29, 2004 12:08 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 12:08
22. Posted by andre3000 | October 29, 2004 12:26 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
My opponent then said he carved his pumpkin before he DIDN'T carve his pumpkin.
22. Posted by andre3000 | October 29, 2004 12:26 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 12:26
23. Posted by moseby | October 29, 2004 12:29 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"At this time, I'd like to introduce the rarely seen 4th party candidates that Govenor Rendell forced off the ballot. You see...he was afraid they would steal votes from the Kerry/Edwards ticket..."
23. Posted by moseby | October 29, 2004 12:29 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 12:29
24. Posted by LargeBill | October 29, 2004 12:43 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Unlike my opponent over there, my tan is real."
24. Posted by LargeBill | October 29, 2004 12:43 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 12:43
25. Posted by McGehee | October 29, 2004 12:45 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"These gourds will surely vote for meeeeeeeeeee!"
25. Posted by McGehee | October 29, 2004 12:45 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 12:45
26. Posted by RightWingDuck | October 29, 2004 1:20 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
George Bush amazes the Texas crowd with his amazing shadow puppet - of the American Flag - in Color!!
Okay, maybe I'm not as good a speaker as my pumpkin opponents but I have heart.
26. Posted by RightWingDuck | October 29, 2004 1:20 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 13:20
27. Posted by Tripped | October 29, 2004 1:28 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Bush, seeing an opportunity to get more women voters stepped up into Martha Steward’s shoes and did a demonstration on how to decorate for Halloween. “When carving a pumpkin you need to be sure to use a flexible knife, but not one that tends to flip flop to much”.
27. Posted by Tripped | October 29, 2004 1:28 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 13:28
28. Posted by Tripped | October 29, 2004 1:29 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Bush, seeing an opportunity to get more women voters stepped up into Martha Steward’s shoes and did a demonstration on how to decorate for Halloween. “When carving a pumpkin you need to be sure to use a flexible knife, but not one that tends to flip flop to much”.
28. Posted by Tripped | October 29, 2004 1:29 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 13:29
29. Posted by Halloweenie | October 29, 2004 1:31 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"This is your head. This is your head if you vote Kerry"
29. Posted by Halloweenie | October 29, 2004 1:31 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 13:31
30. Posted by Jim | October 29, 2004 1:38 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"And my opponent, Pumpkin Head, is your garden variety Liberal pumpkin head."
30. Posted by Jim | October 29, 2004 1:38 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 13:38
31. Posted by Jay Swash | October 29, 2004 1:45 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"These two are just like my opponents... on is useless and full of mush, and the other is pretty but completely hollow!"
31. Posted by Jay Swash | October 29, 2004 1:45 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 13:45
32. Posted by Jay Swash | October 29, 2004 1:47 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"These two are just like my opponents... on is useless and full of mush, and the other is pretty but completely hollow!"
32. Posted by Jay Swash | October 29, 2004 1:47 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 13:47
33. Posted by DBub | October 29, 2004 2:12 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The President did much better in debate number four... but still lost.
33. Posted by DBub | October 29, 2004 2:12 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 14:12
34. Posted by MetallicaRat | October 29, 2004 2:17 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
My opponent over there, oh wait. Heh. Sorry. Got confused. That poor punkin looks nothing like Kerry. Skin color's right, but the punkin's face is way too short.
34. Posted by MetallicaRat | October 29, 2004 2:17 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 14:17
35. Posted by george | October 29, 2004 2:32 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
In may, my opponent was green. Now, when it's election season, he's become orange. If elected, I'm sure he will return to his true color; red.
35. Posted by george | October 29, 2004 2:32 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 14:32
36. Posted by Jeff Medcalf | October 29, 2004 2:48 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
...and this star represents Texas, where you can carve John Kerry's head like a Jack-o-Lantern...and I'll help.
36. Posted by Jeff Medcalf | October 29, 2004 2:48 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 14:48
37. Posted by Jeff Medcalf | October 29, 2004 2:50 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
...and this star represents Texas, where you can carve John Kerry's head like a Jack-o-Lantern...and I'll help.
37. Posted by Jeff Medcalf | October 29, 2004 2:50 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 14:50
38. Posted by Jeff Medcalf | October 29, 2004 2:53 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
...and this star represents Texas, where you can carve John Kerry's head like a Jack-o-Lantern...and I'll help.
38. Posted by Jeff Medcalf | October 29, 2004 2:53 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 14:53
39. Posted by The Race Card | October 29, 2004 2:57 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Trick or Treating...folks.
It's Hard work. And, we're working hard at it.
39. Posted by The Race Card | October 29, 2004 2:57 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 14:57
40. Posted by Tig | October 29, 2004 4:08 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Despite the continual rumors flowing out of my opponent's camp to the otherwise, I do too know the difference between the flag and a pumpkin.
40. Posted by Tig | October 29, 2004 4:08 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 16:08
41. Posted by Carl | October 29, 2004 4:33 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
On my left, my esteemed opponent, John Kerry!
41. Posted by Carl | October 29, 2004 4:33 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 16:33
42. Posted by billy | October 29, 2004 5:11 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Ladies and Gentlemen, here's Gallagher with a nice visual to remind everyone how I deal with terrorists...Gallagher!
42. Posted by billy | October 29, 2004 5:11 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 17:11
43. Posted by chas | October 29, 2004 5:22 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Shucks, I told you we should've had this debate before midnight, look what happened to my opponent!
43. Posted by chas | October 29, 2004 5:22 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 17:22
44. Posted by Truth Peddler | October 29, 2004 5:37 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"...and so I judo chopped the pumpkin like this"
44. Posted by Truth Peddler | October 29, 2004 5:37 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 17:37
45. Posted by MahaRichie | October 29, 2004 5:42 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"These two pumpkins have a better chance of 'defending America' then do my two opponents".
45. Posted by MahaRichie | October 29, 2004 5:42 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 17:42
46. Posted by Stephen W. Stanton | October 29, 2004 6:22 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Y'all recognize this here American Flag. Do you see a hammer & sickle on it? Do you see any high-fallutin' UN or EU symbols on it? No sir. I look at this flag, I see pride, I see principle, I see more than two centuries of hard-fought American history that created the strongest, freest and best nation on earth. John Kerry sees toilet paper fresh for the next wipe.
46. Posted by Stephen W. Stanton | October 29, 2004 6:22 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 18:22
47. Posted by Joe | October 29, 2004 7:45 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
What am I bid for these fine pumpkins? For the carved one, do I hear $1,000? Going once...going twice...
47. Posted by Joe | October 29, 2004 7:45 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 19:45
48. Posted by Joe | October 29, 2004 7:48 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"So I took my hand, did like _so_" (makes karate gesture), "chopped into that sucker, and did a perfect carve with my secret kung fu powers! Let's see my opponent do so much with his magic hat..."
48. Posted by Joe | October 29, 2004 7:48 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 19:48
49. Posted by Tim in PA | October 29, 2004 7:56 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Now, if you'll bear with me for a a moment, imagine that pumpkin sitting right over there is John Kerry's head. Yes, that big one..."
49. Posted by Tim in PA | October 29, 2004 7:56 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 19:56
50. Posted by alexander | October 29, 2004 9:55 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Looks like these two have the same stylist as Senator Kerry!
50. Posted by alexander | October 29, 2004 9:55 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 21:55
51. Posted by LF | October 29, 2004 10:24 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
And then I put my hand like this, and Cheney hit another note on that electrical organ he had. And then the alien ship blasted out the same tone at us, smashed up the windows on the control towers somethin fierce! In the silence that followed, the belly of the ship opened up, and out of a blinding light came a bunch of midget aliens. They all sort of put their hands on me, and I kind of floated for a bit there. Uhhh . . . what was I saying?
51. Posted by LF | October 29, 2004 10:24 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 29, 2004 22:24
52. Posted by Charlie Satchfield | October 30, 2004 4:29 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
During Senator Kerry's background investigation, he discovered I own a punkin patch.
Wanna buy some punkins?
52. Posted by Charlie Satchfield | October 30, 2004 4:29 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 30, 2004 04:29
53. Posted by Idris | October 30, 2004 7:43 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Bush unveils new stealth "nu-ku-lar" bunker busters.
53. Posted by Idris | October 30, 2004 7:43 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 30, 2004 07:43
54. Posted by Idris | October 30, 2004 7:44 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Bush unveils new stealth "nu-kul-ar" bunker busters.
54. Posted by Idris | October 30, 2004 7:44 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 30, 2004 07:44
55. Posted by Branna | October 30, 2004 8:22 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Bush is very passionate in his love FOR his country. Therefore my caption would be...
"Now is the time to ask not what your country can do for you but what you can do for your country."
55. Posted by Branna | October 30, 2004 8:22 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 30, 2004 08:22
56. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 30, 2004 10:40 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Rumsfeld's pranks on George often went unnoticed as the President did not react to Saddam, in the front row, under the white hat.
56. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 30, 2004 10:40 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 30, 2004 10:40
57. Posted by -S- | October 30, 2004 10:57 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"So, folks, here are two pumpkins.
That smaller one over there is Senator Kerry's."
57. Posted by -S- | October 30, 2004 10:57 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 30, 2004 10:57
58. Posted by -S- | October 30, 2004 11:00 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Bush:
"See? I made the pie higher!"
58. Posted by -S- | October 30, 2004 11:00 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 30, 2004 11:00
59. Posted by JAB | October 30, 2004 12:36 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
President George W. Bush alleges voter fraud in Ohio by producing two pumpkins registered as Democrat voters in Bucks County. Neither pumpkin would comment on the allegation.
59. Posted by JAB | October 30, 2004 12:36 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 30, 2004 12:36
60. Posted by Jim | October 30, 2004 1:26 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
This here first pumpkin is your brain on conservative ideology. Purty aint it? Now look at that second ugly little twisted sucker, that one is your brain on the stuff that John Kerry has been smokin!
snicker
60. Posted by Jim | October 30, 2004 1:26 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 30, 2004 13:26
61. Posted by KipEsquire | October 30, 2004 2:26 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
And of course, I wouldn't be here today if it weren't for my two closest advisors, Vice President Cheney and Secretary Rumsfeld over here...
61. Posted by KipEsquire | October 30, 2004 2:26 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 30, 2004 14:26
62. Posted by Linus | October 30, 2004 5:40 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
So you'll be able to recognize my opponents after Nov. 2nd...
62. Posted by Linus | October 30, 2004 5:40 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 30, 2004 17:40
63. Posted by Rafiki | October 31, 2004 12:13 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The gala was in full swing as the noble POTUS thanked his guests for coming. Suddenly the clock struck twelve, and Sir John found himself at once darkly confined in his once roomy carriage... and strangely covered in seeds.
63. Posted by Rafiki | October 31, 2004 12:13 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 31, 2004 00:13
64. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 31, 2004 9:46 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"The 388 Tons of high explosives wasn't stolen or missing. The stuff is so stable and pliable I've had it all molded into Jack-O-Lanterns for children all across this great country. All you they have to do is make sure to keep them away from flame...WHADDYA MEAN THEY STILL USE REAL CANDLES!
64. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 31, 2004 9:46 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 31, 2004 09:46
65. Posted by JAB | October 31, 2004 11:34 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"With two of the most liberal voting records in Congress, both John Kerry and John Edwards have consistently misrepresented themselves in this election race. The truth is they're just like those two pumpkins . . . a head full of mush, no vision for the future, and you can't get them to tell you where they stand."
65. Posted by JAB | October 31, 2004 11:34 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 31, 2004 23:34
66. Posted by Rodney Dill | November 12, 2004 2:42 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"In lieu of me attending the funeral, the US is sending these two festive urns for Arafat's ashes."
66. Posted by Rodney Dill | November 12, 2004 2:42 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on November 12, 2004 14:42