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Comments (161)
In the name of Christopher ... (Below threshold)1. Posted by leelu | October 15, 2004 5:17 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
In the name of Christopher Reeve, *ARISE*!
(Except you litle people. God, I'm tired of this shit....)
1. Posted by leelu | October 15, 2004 5:17 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:17
2. Posted by Stephen Swanson | October 15, 2004 5:17 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"The stack of money to pay your taxes is going to need to be about this high."
2. Posted by Stephen Swanson | October 15, 2004 5:17 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:17
3. Posted by jmaster | October 15, 2004 5:18 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"I’ve got a special cure for dealing with John. Put six raisins in a bottle of gin, drink the gin, and throw out the raisins"
3. Posted by jmaster | October 15, 2004 5:18 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:18
4. Posted by Joel (No Pundit Intended) | October 15, 2004 5:18 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Mrs Kerry! Can you ell us how the senator performs in bed?"
4. Posted by Joel (No Pundit Intended) | October 15, 2004 5:18 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:18
5. Posted by Joe R. | October 15, 2004 5:20 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I should have used a stack of hairspray cans this tall.
5. Posted by Joe R. | October 15, 2004 5:20 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:20
6. Posted by Neo | October 15, 2004 5:21 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
An zen you... uh... *hic* eet zee rasins zat you soaked in gin and uh... what was I saying?
6. Posted by Neo | October 15, 2004 5:21 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:21
7. Posted by Sean | October 15, 2004 5:21 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Living in a material world, And I am a material girl."
7. Posted by Sean | October 15, 2004 5:21 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:21
8. Posted by Jim in Chicago | October 15, 2004 5:23 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
So, you put the raisins, white raisins, in about a liter of gin, and then you throw the f***in' raisins out, drink the gin, all of it, washing down an elephant tranquilizer, and, bob's your uncle, no more arthritis pain! I just did the very thing before coming out on stage, and boy do I feel good. What was I saying again?
8. Posted by Jim in Chicago | October 15, 2004 5:23 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:23
9. Posted by MahaRichie | October 15, 2004 5:25 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"SHOVE IT! YOU SCUMBAG IDIOT",and how did my monogrammed panties wind up on YOUR HEAD?
Oh my God, I think I ate too many white raisins...
9. Posted by MahaRichie | October 15, 2004 5:25 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:25
10. Posted by HOTROD | October 15, 2004 5:25 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I THINK SHE A DEFINITE CANDIDATE FOR EXTREME MAKEOVER............IS THIS THE KIND OF 1ST LADY WE REALLY WANT TO LOOK AT EVERY DAY...........BABARA BUSH COULD HER A FEW POINTERS ON WHAT TO DO WHEN U WAKE UP IN THE MORNING STARTING WITH A NICE SHOWER.
10. Posted by HOTROD | October 15, 2004 5:25 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:25
11. Posted by Orville | October 15, 2004 5:26 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I am so over.
11. Posted by Orville | October 15, 2004 5:26 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:26
12. Posted by David Hamilton | October 15, 2004 5:27 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
It is I, Strong Woman. Make that Strong, Rich Woman.
I'm going to give John an allowance just as soon as
he's old enough.
12. Posted by David Hamilton | October 15, 2004 5:27 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:27
13. Posted by Sean | October 15, 2004 5:28 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Coming soon to a theatre near you - Austin Powers Incognito.
13. Posted by Sean | October 15, 2004 5:28 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:28
14. Posted by Sean | October 15, 2004 5:29 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Dustin Hoffman attempts to reprise his award winning role.
14. Posted by Sean | October 15, 2004 5:29 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:29
15. Posted by Sean | October 15, 2004 5:30 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Man or Woman - only the bravest will ever know.
15. Posted by Sean | October 15, 2004 5:30 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:30
16. Posted by Hunter | October 15, 2004 5:33 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
- I've been trying to screw a Republican since I was thisssss tall -
- All you little people in the front row move back....I just put fresh batteries in this French mike -
- Sooooo all you scumbags keep sayng my John boy does every position....Why the hell do you think I married him you idiots -
16. Posted by Hunter | October 15, 2004 5:33 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:33
17. Posted by Chad Evans | October 15, 2004 5:33 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Christopher Reeves died so he didn't have to get drafted under a second Bush Administration. Too bad, because my husband has a plan that would have cured him."
17. Posted by Chad Evans | October 15, 2004 5:33 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:33
18. Posted by david K | October 15, 2004 5:36 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Actually, I have been told I look a little like Michael Jackson....perhaps thats because we're both black...or at least he was once....
18. Posted by david K | October 15, 2004 5:36 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:36
19. Posted by Patrick Lasswell | October 15, 2004 5:40 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Proving conclusively that she will be a change of pace from Laura Bush, Ms. Heinz-Kerry championed her new look, "Rode Hard and Put Up Wet!"
19. Posted by Patrick Lasswell | October 15, 2004 5:40 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:40
20. Posted by Conservatie Revolution | October 15, 2004 5:42 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Zig Heil! Zig Heil!
20. Posted by Conservatie Revolution | October 15, 2004 5:42 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:42
21. Posted by Mark | October 15, 2004 5:42 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
This getting up at 11:00am is cutting down on my detoxification time !
21. Posted by Mark | October 15, 2004 5:42 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:42
22. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 5:43 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
So, when my Johnny couldn't think of anything nice to say about me to Schaffer at the debate Wednesday, I bitch slapped his ass, attached the dog collar to his feeble neck and put my strap-on to him....
22. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 5:43 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:43
23. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 5:44 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
No, but thanks for asking. I do get mistaken for Andrew Sullivan quite a bit actually.....
23. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 5:44 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:44
24. Posted by TC-LeatherPenguin | October 15, 2004 5:44 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"You doubt the raisins? Look at my hand ... solid like a rock."
24. Posted by TC-LeatherPenguin | October 15, 2004 5:44 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:44
25. Posted by rorochub | October 15, 2004 5:46 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Those Bush girls really do have nice legs.
25. Posted by rorochub | October 15, 2004 5:46 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:46
26. Posted by Brian Beatty | October 15, 2004 5:49 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Look at how steady my hand is after having my raisins and gin. I'm invincible!
26. Posted by Brian Beatty | October 15, 2004 5:49 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:49
27. Posted by The Hort | October 15, 2004 5:49 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Oh God, my hand is bluring again. Johnny!! Johnny!!! Get me my damn raisins!!!"
27. Posted by The Hort | October 15, 2004 5:49 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:49
28. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 5:51 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Well, I can't release my tax returns to the public; the stack is this tall according to my accountant.....
28. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 5:51 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:51
29. Posted by Aaron's Rantblog | October 15, 2004 5:52 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Fat guy near my elbow makes me happy
Fat guy voting Bush would make me cry
Fat guy near my elbow looks so homely
Fat guy inheritances always makes me high
If I had a tax that I could tax you
I’d give to you a tax that I won't pay
If I had a tax that I could force on you
I'd sing a song that Mary Cheney's gay
[original John Denver]
29. Posted by Aaron's Rantblog | October 15, 2004 5:52 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:52
30. Posted by J.Murphy | October 15, 2004 5:54 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Just take nine Gin soaked raisins and call me in the morning.
30. Posted by J.Murphy | October 15, 2004 5:54 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:54
31. Posted by Aaron's Rantblog | October 15, 2004 5:54 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Then John tried to kiss me so I pushed his head down like this.
31. Posted by Aaron's Rantblog | October 15, 2004 5:54 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:54
32. Posted by Aaron's Rantblog | October 15, 2004 5:55 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
And this shaky hand is the one I use to brush my hair.
32. Posted by Aaron's Rantblog | October 15, 2004 5:55 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:55
33. Posted by Clay Jarr | October 15, 2004 5:56 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"And if you elect my husband as President, people like Mary Cheney will become straight."
33. Posted by Clay Jarr | October 15, 2004 5:56 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 17:56
34. Posted by Stephen Macklin | October 15, 2004 6:01 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Ladiesh and zhentlemen - urrrp
Mr. Michel Moore.
34. Posted by Stephen Macklin | October 15, 2004 6:01 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:01
35. Posted by Stephen Macklin | October 15, 2004 6:02 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
All the people on this side of the room look like they make about $40k.
35. Posted by Stephen Macklin | October 15, 2004 6:02 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:02
36. Posted by daniel | October 15, 2004 6:06 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"This song is for all you peasants and peons out there who think my second hubby will make a fine Prime Minister; HIT IT JOE:
[SINGING]
Allons enfants de la Patrie
Le jour de gloire est arrivé!"
[La Marseillaise] http://marseillaise.org/audio/marseillaise.wav-
36. Posted by daniel | October 15, 2004 6:06 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:06
37. Posted by MahaRichie | October 15, 2004 6:07 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Yes Heinz Ketchup IS thick and rich...The easiest way to get it out,is to give a sharp smack on the "bottom" like this"..."It works every time...Just ask John."
37. Posted by MahaRichie | October 15, 2004 6:07 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:07
38. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 6:07 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
... and then, we had this cute lil houseboy growing up on that plantation... he couldn't have been more than 10 or 11, but he made me an African that day long ago....
38. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 6:07 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:07
39. Posted by david | October 15, 2004 6:07 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
People always tease John that he is so tall and they say "I didn't know you could stack sh** that high". Acutally, he is only this much sh** and the rest hot air. But at least he has a plan!!
39. Posted by david | October 15, 2004 6:07 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:07
40. Posted by chris | October 15, 2004 6:10 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
You put the raisins in the Tanqueray and call me in the mo-o-o-orning
40. Posted by chris | October 15, 2004 6:10 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:10
41. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 6:10 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Look, if you elect John, I swear we'll bring back intern sex to the White House.... I promised John he could....
41. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 6:10 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:10
42. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 6:12 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
You know, I didn't know that nice Michael J Fox was only this tall either... but Johnny says Edwards will cure him if we're elected. Might even help that Muhammed Ali fella too.... it's in the plan.
42. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 6:12 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:12
43. Posted by Jim | October 15, 2004 6:12 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"I am not an alcoholic or drug addict-- see my hand is almost as steady as a rock"
43. Posted by Jim | October 15, 2004 6:12 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:12
44. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 15, 2004 6:15 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Sorry John, I just can't carry on the charade anymore. Yes, I am Frank J's love monkey."
44. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 15, 2004 6:15 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:15
45. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 15, 2004 6:19 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
'No, my husband is not some washed up, fat, drunken, incoherent, has been politician. That would be the other Senator from Massachusetts."
"...And if you don't believe me you can check the facts at fatchicks.com, no wait a minute, that's fatchicks.org. ...Sorry, nothing personal, Mrs. Edwards."
45. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 15, 2004 6:19 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:19
46. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 6:20 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I don't know why Lynne Cheney is ashamed of her daughter Mary, who is a lesbian. My children are not ashamed of me.....
46. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 6:20 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:20
47. Posted by McGehee | October 15, 2004 6:31 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Aren't I rich?
Do you like my hair?
Me up here where I belong,
You way out there.
Send in the clown.
Isn't it bliss?
Don't you approve?
My John keeps spinning around,
But his polls don't move.
Where is the clown?
Send in the clown.
Just when I'd stopped beating the help,
Finally knowing the one that I wanted was yours,
Making my entrance again with my horrible hair,
Sure of my lines,
No one is there.
Don't you love farce?
My fault I fear.
I thought that you'd give me what I want.
Sorry, my dear.
But where is the clown?
Quick, send in the clowns.
Don't bother, he's here.
47. Posted by McGehee | October 15, 2004 6:31 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:31
48. Posted by TallDave | October 15, 2004 6:36 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Let this be a lesson to all of you-- never stick your fingers in an electrical outlet!"
48. Posted by TallDave | October 15, 2004 6:36 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:36
49. Posted by jmaster | October 15, 2004 6:37 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
During a campaign stop at the Berkeley Home for Burned Out Hippies, Terreza Heinz Kerry tries to recapture the karma of their glory days by leading the patients in song:
“And its vone, two, fthree,
vhat are vee fightink for?
Don’t ask me, I don’t give a damn
Next stop vill be Iran,
Vell, eets, five, zeex, zeven,
open up the pearly gates
Vell, there ain’t no time, to vonder vhy,
Voopee, ve’re all goink to die!”
49. Posted by jmaster | October 15, 2004 6:37 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:37
50. Posted by azygos | October 15, 2004 6:39 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The democratic crowd did not realize Teresa had been replaced with a wax figure until the entire bank of lights was turned on and caused her to begin to melt.
50. Posted by azygos | October 15, 2004 6:39 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:39
51. Posted by OhioanForBush | October 15, 2004 6:39 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Bet you're wondering how I knew
about your plans to make me BLUE!
With some girl you knew before...
But that's what prenupts are for!
Oh yeah, I heard it through the grapevine,
After 'lection day you'd no longer be mine!
Ooooh Yeah, I heard it throught the grapevine,
of your PLAN; you filthy swine...."
51. Posted by OhioanForBush | October 15, 2004 6:39 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:39
52. Posted by Aaron | October 15, 2004 6:39 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
As a matter of fact, I have been eating raisins today, so just shove it scumbag!
52. Posted by Aaron | October 15, 2004 6:39 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:39
53. Posted by Russ | October 15, 2004 6:41 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"The power of rum-soaked raisins compels you!"
53. Posted by Russ | October 15, 2004 6:41 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:41
54. Posted by Layman | October 15, 2004 6:50 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
. . . . .
I was going to write something, but realized that nothing any of us could invent can match the things she really says.
54. Posted by Layman | October 15, 2004 6:50 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:50
55. Posted by Maureen | October 15, 2004 6:52 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Anticipation, anticipa-aaa-tion
Is making me crazed
Is keeping me hating...
55. Posted by Maureen | October 15, 2004 6:52 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:52
56. Posted by KJC | October 15, 2004 6:57 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I don't have a quippy caption, but that microphone looks like John Kerry from behind!
56. Posted by KJC | October 15, 2004 6:57 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:57
57. Posted by Russ | October 15, 2004 6:57 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Damn. That should have been "gin-soaked raisins compels...."
57. Posted by Russ | October 15, 2004 6:57 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:57
58. Posted by Scott Stark | October 15, 2004 6:59 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"In my earlier days as an African-American, when I was about this tall...."
58. Posted by Scott Stark | October 15, 2004 6:59 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 18:59
59. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 7:01 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I do not understand what that is.... what is this moonbat you are talking about?
59. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 7:01 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:01
60. Posted by Swede | October 15, 2004 7:07 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I figured hey, if looking like a bag lady got me out of jury duty, maybe it would work with this first lady crap too.
60. Posted by Swede | October 15, 2004 7:07 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:07
61. Posted by Monty Whisenhunt | October 15, 2004 7:08 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"See, even after 9 booze soaked grapes my hand stops trembling and I speak fluent French...uh, I mean English."
61. Posted by Monty Whisenhunt | October 15, 2004 7:08 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:08
62. Posted by Tim in PA | October 15, 2004 7:10 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
".... with a dick this big, people."
62. Posted by Tim in PA | October 15, 2004 7:10 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:10
63. Posted by -S- | October 15, 2004 7:19 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"I once ate a golden raisin...THIS...BIG...!
THEN I drank a glass of gin.
Ever since then, my hand's been frozen in this position, which is what John calls the "love bug" grip.
Which reminds me of Africa. When I was a young girl, growing up in Africa, I always knew that one day I would...have I ever told you that I was born in Africa?"
63. Posted by -S- | October 15, 2004 7:19 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:19
64. Posted by Sergeant America | October 15, 2004 7:19 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
This is how I fellate Johnny... I grasp his mighty unit and lick the ...
64. Posted by Sergeant America | October 15, 2004 7:19 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:19
65. Posted by -S- | October 15, 2004 7:24 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"T is for Teetering.
"E is for Empire.
"R is for RecallRecall.
"E is for Another Empire.
"Z is for the Zebras in Africa that I should tell you about a little bit later, something in the next four hours...
"A is for Africa."
Tomorrow I will tell you about..."
65. Posted by -S- | October 15, 2004 7:24 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:24
66. Posted by Anachronda | October 15, 2004 7:25 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I was born a poor black child...
66. Posted by Anachronda | October 15, 2004 7:25 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:25
67. Posted by Swede | October 15, 2004 7:26 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"You pedestrian yokels are not worthy of me or my Johnny Cakes. You bore me to tears! Do you hear me? This campaign bores me to tears! I am tired to death of asking for votes from people who are not fit to clean my pool. The last thing I want is to be First Lady to a bunch of Wal Mart shopping, football watching, psalm-singing hillbillies"... "Uh, did I say that outloud"?
67. Posted by Swede | October 15, 2004 7:26 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:26
68. Posted by Justin | October 15, 2004 7:30 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Teresa Heinz Kerry, trying to cover Edwards Steps, explained to the the heinz labor union the method to on how they can make ketchup into an elixer that cures all types of nural damage.
68. Posted by Justin | October 15, 2004 7:30 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:30
69. Posted by Jeff Medcalf | October 15, 2004 7:35 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"And this is how I will lay hands on Chris Reeve...what do you mean he died?"
69. Posted by Jeff Medcalf | October 15, 2004 7:35 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:35
70. Posted by Steel Turman | October 15, 2004 7:36 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Undt dis is my schpout"
70. Posted by Steel Turman | October 15, 2004 7:36 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:36
71. Posted by McCain | October 15, 2004 7:38 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
In a shocking campaign twist, Theodore Anaconda, lower left corner, begins to swallow Teresa Heinz Kerry whole. As Anaconda explained later, "Sorrrryyyy everyone. I just couldn't take it anymore."
71. Posted by McCain | October 15, 2004 7:38 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:38
72. Posted by JAB | October 15, 2004 7:40 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Vell, I umped about dis high off da floor . . . I mean I haven't been goosed like dat since the Clinton Administwation. And dat's the last indaview I will evah give Bill O'Wiley!
72. Posted by JAB | October 15, 2004 7:40 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:40
73. Posted by McCain | October 15, 2004 7:40 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
At the Washington Senators season opener, rock legend Mick Jagger sings the Star Spangled Banner.
73. Posted by McCain | October 15, 2004 7:40 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:40
74. Posted by MahaRichie | October 15, 2004 7:41 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
TAKE NOTE PANTYHEADS...jmaster,with his unique creativity is crushing you ! (and even me).
I hope the judges take the panties off their own heads for once.
74. Posted by MahaRichie | October 15, 2004 7:41 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:41
75. Posted by Dan O | October 15, 2004 7:46 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Elephants! Pink, this tall.... and and... They kept coming and coming and coming.
75. Posted by Dan O | October 15, 2004 7:46 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:46
76. Posted by Bill | October 15, 2004 7:52 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Even though I have to be back at the Betty Ford clinic in a few hours...
76. Posted by Bill | October 15, 2004 7:52 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:52
77. Posted by MahaRichie | October 15, 2004 7:52 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
JAB:Thanks for the laugh.
And thanks that we are starting to get some entrants who are not infected with Lame Disease.
77. Posted by MahaRichie | October 15, 2004 7:52 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:52
78. Posted by Jim | October 15, 2004 7:52 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
You need a bottle of gin about thiiiiiis high and 52 and 1/2 marshmallows, or was it raisins. Anyway, soak em in the gin and your warts will go away when you tape the gin soaked marshmallows to your hiney!
:)
78. Posted by Jim | October 15, 2004 7:52 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:52
79. Posted by Doug | October 15, 2004 7:53 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Drunk blogging the debates? Hold it there scumbags, I do it live.
79. Posted by Doug | October 15, 2004 7:53 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:53
80. Posted by TallDave | October 15, 2004 7:54 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"John Kerry will make the U.S. repected again!"
"When France takes a crap on America, my husband will be there to thank them and wipe their asses clean!" shouted Mrs. Kerry to thunderous applause from Democrats. "And if necessary, he will use... his... tongue!!"
(Hey, she did say she was a little kinky)
80. Posted by TallDave | October 15, 2004 7:54 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:54
81. Posted by dan | October 15, 2004 7:54 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
around me JOHN is only this tall!!!
81. Posted by dan | October 15, 2004 7:54 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:54
82. Posted by Dittybopper | October 15, 2004 7:55 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Yes, little Johnny Edwards would make a nice boy toy, but I can't deal with that plus-sized wench he is married to - maybe after dickweed looses the election I can promise little Johnny that if he puts on his kneepads, I will fund his primary run in 08.
82. Posted by Dittybopper | October 15, 2004 7:55 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:55
83. Posted by Jim | October 15, 2004 7:56 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Has Dustin Hoffman gotten UGLY since he did tootsie or what?
This is the worst case of severe appearance deficit we have seen to date.
Send your money. Just 29 cents a week will buy this person a paper bag and save us all some grief!
83. Posted by Jim | October 15, 2004 7:56 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:56
84. Posted by McCain | October 15, 2004 7:58 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Dateline 2010 -- The eccentric aristocrat, Teresa Heinz Kerry, begins her curious striptease act at the Las Vegas Hilton.
84. Posted by McCain | October 15, 2004 7:58 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:58
85. Posted by Use The Forks | October 15, 2004 7:59 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
You are getting sleepy...very sleepy...when I snap my fingers and each of you low life peasants will go out and buy 2 bottles Heinz's high margin new Green Ketchup.
85. Posted by Use The Forks | October 15, 2004 7:59 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 19:59
86. Posted by Nomorelies | October 15, 2004 8:00 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
About this much gin and a handful of raisins....
86. Posted by Nomorelies | October 15, 2004 8:00 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 20:00
87. Posted by JimK | October 15, 2004 8:07 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Hey! ...*hic*... You! In the serving jacket. I asked ...*hic*... for a martini. Now get me my martini before I ...*hic*... have you executed, you peasant. You're probably one of the gays, aren't you? ...*hic*... "
87. Posted by JimK | October 15, 2004 8:07 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 20:07
88. Posted by Mike | October 15, 2004 8:08 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
To Russ:
If gin and rum can't be distinguished, maybe it is time to stop drinking anything. :)
Hopefully this works. I am a Mac person using a Windows' laptop. I know that the post is not much, but I am now wondering if I can even make it work! :)
88. Posted by Mike | October 15, 2004 8:08 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 20:08
89. Posted by Hotogo | October 15, 2004 8:17 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"First Frump"
89. Posted by Hotogo | October 15, 2004 8:17 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 20:17
90. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 8:38 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Then John's mama tells him, 'Integrity, integrity, integrity.' And I'll be damned if we know what she was talking about...
90. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 8:38 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 20:38
91. Posted by Headzero | October 15, 2004 8:43 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Raisins, schmasins - I just downed a bottle of Maddog 20/20 and had a gin chaser. Does the same thing as the damn raisins but you don't have to wait. See no arthritis, just shakes - but I can't feel those either.
91. Posted by Headzero | October 15, 2004 8:43 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 20:43
92. Posted by MahaRichie | October 15, 2004 9:09 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Yes,I will tell you why my John is a great debater.Right before he goes on stage,I say John smell these fingers..remember the aroma..this is what will be waiting for you if you do good...I am a great believer in Aromatherapy...plus, he just loves fish."
92. Posted by MahaRichie | October 15, 2004 9:09 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 21:09
93. Posted by cbk | October 15, 2004 9:17 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"As you know, John is 6'4" tall. Well, I tell you, he felt THIS tall when I was done reaming him for bragging about marrying up and THEN going on and on about his dead mother the other night."
93. Posted by cbk | October 15, 2004 9:17 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 21:17
94. Posted by joe | October 15, 2004 9:31 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
You fukkin plebians better elect John president or I will send another 53,000 Heinz jobs overseas
94. Posted by joe | October 15, 2004 9:31 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 21:31
95. Posted by Keith | October 15, 2004 9:31 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"And so I patted my little Johnny on the head and told him; don't cry Johnny I'll give you the money to buy the White House."
95. Posted by Keith | October 15, 2004 9:31 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 21:31
96. Posted by Blueblood and raisins | October 15, 2004 9:40 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
You met me... What will I tell my friends?
96. Posted by Blueblood and raisins | October 15, 2004 9:40 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 21:40
97. Posted by BlogDog | October 15, 2004 9:41 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
And then this white-trash Kansas famhouse comes spiralling down out of the sky and crushes my sister. My sister! Those Muchkins were lucky I wasn't there to get her ruby slippers.
97. Posted by BlogDog | October 15, 2004 9:41 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 21:41
98. Posted by MahaRichie | October 15, 2004 9:49 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
BlooDog:You are supposed to eat the raisins not chug the gin...sober up!
98. Posted by MahaRichie | October 15, 2004 9:49 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 21:49
99. Posted by Master of None | October 15, 2004 9:53 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"A WHITE RAISON SOAKED IN GIN"
99. Posted by Master of None | October 15, 2004 9:53 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 21:53
100. Posted by Master of None | October 15, 2004 9:55 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
damn, I ment RAISIN
100. Posted by Master of None | October 15, 2004 9:55 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 21:55
101. Posted by Richard | October 15, 2004 10:03 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Teresa Heinz Kerry illustrating how John is going to wave his hands and make everyone's problems disappear.
101. Posted by Richard | October 15, 2004 10:03 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 22:03
102. Posted by MahaRichie | October 15, 2004 10:04 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Master of None:[ I "ment"RAISIN.] Now either you and BlooDog are the same person or you are getting "sloshed togrther".
102. Posted by MahaRichie | October 15, 2004 10:04 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 22:04
103. Posted by spacemonkey | October 15, 2004 10:10 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
'And Bush doesn't want you to be able get cheap raisins and gin from Canada.'
103. Posted by spacemonkey | October 15, 2004 10:10 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 22:10
104. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 15, 2004 10:14 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Arrangement: Moon(bat)Shallow
Artist: Cat's Heavin'
Yes
Dubya's sequestered old Osama
Bin Laden,
Bin Laden
keepin' and hidin' that Osama
Bin Laden,
Bin Laden
And
If Dubya brings Bin Laden out
Voter's will scream,
"he got that lout,"
If Dubya brings Bin Laden out
and if...
I won't make it to the Whitehouse door.
Yes
Dubya's sequestered old Osama
Bin Laden,
Bin Laden
keepin' and hidin' that Osama
Bin Laden,
Bin Laden
Oh
If Dubya makes fun of John's Iraq Plan
Folks will see,
he should get canned
If Dubya make fun of John's Iraq Plan
Oh if...
I can still make that Whitehouse Score.
Yes
Dubya's sequestered old Osama
Bin Laden, Bin Laden
keepin' and hidin' that Osama
Bin Laden, Bin Laden
Oh
If old Osama should get away
I'll have something strong to say
If that Osama should get away
O if....
I'll tell Dubya, SHOVE IT...
John's got the plan to run it, don't be fooled by Dubya's right.
It won't cost much to fund it, vote for John election night.
Yes
Dubya's sequestered old Osama
Bin Laden, Bin Laden
keepin' and hidin' that Osama
Bin Laden, Bin Laden
Bin Laden, Bin Laden
Bin Laden, Bin Laden
(I know, I know, the only artist you like less than Boy George is Cat Stevent)
104. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 15, 2004 10:14 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 22:14
105. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 15, 2004 10:16 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Make that Cat Stevens
105. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 15, 2004 10:16 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 22:16
106. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 15, 2004 10:35 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
DRUDGE BREAKING: Reuters photo has offered this visual evidence the Yasser Arafat's recent sex change operation was indeed a success.... maybe.
106. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 15, 2004 10:35 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 22:35
107. Posted by D Carter | October 15, 2004 10:43 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I never called Bush a pig! I just said that after the election he could have a successful career hunting for truffles on my estate in France.
107. Posted by D Carter | October 15, 2004 10:43 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 22:43
108. Posted by fRANK wolynski | October 15, 2004 10:45 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Yea, I say unto thee, Nov. 2nd, all yee afflicted with unspeakable sickness, shall be HEELED.!"
or
"John was only this tall when I met him, but his head was really huge." I said, "John, get off your knees, I'm not Ted Kennedy."
108. Posted by fRANK wolynski | October 15, 2004 10:45 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 22:45
109. Posted by McGehee | October 15, 2004 10:47 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"If you tink Boosh's father made a big splash on dat Japanese prime minister, just you vait until I get fallink down shnockered at der inauguration! I'll get der revenge on dose Supreme Court ninnies for shtealink der election four years ago!"
109. Posted by McGehee | October 15, 2004 10:47 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 22:47
110. Posted by Stephen W. Stanton | October 15, 2004 10:51 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
OK, idiots go over there on the right, near the scumbags. You people on the left, please ignore the scumbags and idiots.
110. Posted by Stephen W. Stanton | October 15, 2004 10:51 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 22:51
111. Posted by McGehee | October 15, 2004 10:54 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Johnny, Johnny, that's who you should vote for
He gives me something I can hold on to
I know you'll think he's like the others before
Who promised you the moon, gave nothing at all
Johnny has got your number
He should rule over you swine
Voting for Boosh would be dumber
Kerry-Edvards 2004 (Kerry-Edvards 2004)
Kerry-Edvards 2004 (Kerry-Edvards 2004)
Johnny, Johnny he's the boy for you
Voting for him would make me so happy
He voted for it before
But he lost his nerve
He'll be a better leader
Than you peasants deserve
Johnny has got your number
He should rule over you swine
Voting for Boosh would be dumber
Kerry-Edvards 2004 (Kerry-Edvards 2004)
Kerry-Edvards 2004 (Kerry-Edvards 2004)
He's got it (He's got it), He's got it
He's got a surplus of gall
He's got it (He's got it), He's got it
For the last time
For the last time call
Johnny has got your number
He should rule over you swine
Voting for Boosh would be dumber
Kerry-Edvards 2004 (Kerry-Edvards 2004)
Kerry-Edvards 2004 (Kerry-Edvards 2004)
111. Posted by McGehee | October 15, 2004 10:54 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 22:54
112. Posted by Rob | October 15, 2004 10:57 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
(rapping)
Its like this and like that and like this and uh...
112. Posted by Rob | October 15, 2004 10:57 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 22:57
113. Posted by Dodd | October 15, 2004 10:57 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"This campaigning jaunt is much more pleasant after the Valium kicks in."
113. Posted by Dodd | October 15, 2004 10:57 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 22:57
114. Posted by Brian | October 15, 2004 11:04 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Put it this way fellas...when I'm done being first lady you're gonna BEG for that Hillary bitch to come back.
114. Posted by Brian | October 15, 2004 11:04 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 23:04
115. Posted by BigHodag | October 15, 2004 11:07 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
My name is Teresa and I'm an alcoholic.
I started innocently with just one or two raisins after lunch, then five, and now its nine raisins everyday. Not those common black raisins. Those exquisite white raisins soaked in gin. Oh! How I wish I had a raisin right now!
115. Posted by BigHodag | October 15, 2004 11:07 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 23:07
116. Posted by Roundguy | October 15, 2004 11:11 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I once had a husband this tall.
116. Posted by Roundguy | October 15, 2004 11:11 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 23:11
117. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 11:21 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Rollin down the street, smokin indo, sippin on gin and juice
Laid back (with my mind on my money and my money on my mind)"
117. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 11:21 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 23:21
118. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 11:28 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
MahaRichie at his regular Tuesday night gig, where he/she once again had the enjoyable opportunity of entertaining regular folks with material that we can confidently say, is not well thought out, not unique and very obtuse... unfortunately, those in attendance were not entertained and asked for their money back....
118. Posted by OneDrummer | October 15, 2004 11:28 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 23:28
119. Posted by ProfShade | October 15, 2004 11:53 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
The scumbags misquote me. Don't they understand Mozambique accent? I did not say soak raisins, I say soak peasants.
119. Posted by ProfShade | October 15, 2004 11:53 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 15, 2004 23:53
120. Posted by jblue | October 16, 2004 12:08 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
my hand isn't shaking
120. Posted by jblue | October 16, 2004 12:08 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 00:08
121. Posted by Patrick | October 16, 2004 12:12 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I'm sorry, I thought Halloween was TODAY...
Nevermind...
121. Posted by Patrick | October 16, 2004 12:12 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 00:12
122. Posted by Patrick | October 16, 2004 12:16 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Okay, imagine Johnny walking around with his hands out like this saying, "Uhhh-hhh-ohhhh."
Come'on... Lurch... Am I right? You know I'm right...
122. Posted by Patrick | October 16, 2004 12:16 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 00:16
123. Posted by dB | October 16, 2004 12:30 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
When will IIIIIIII, Beeeeeeeeeeeeee .... Loooooooooooved?
123. Posted by dB | October 16, 2004 12:30 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 00:30
124. Posted by Elitus | October 16, 2004 12:44 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Who else wants a pat on the head?
124. Posted by Elitus | October 16, 2004 12:44 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 00:44
125. Posted by Herhonor | October 16, 2004 12:49 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Here with you, I feel like Martha.
125. Posted by Herhonor | October 16, 2004 12:49 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 00:49
126. Posted by sfw | October 16, 2004 12:56 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
you can see what John Kerry has done for me today...imagine what could happen tomorrow.
126. Posted by sfw | October 16, 2004 12:56 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 00:56
127. Posted by OCBill | October 16, 2004 12:59 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Madame Toussaud's Wax Museum will be closed today pending repair of their air conditioning system.
127. Posted by OCBill | October 16, 2004 12:59 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 00:59
128. Posted by gdr | October 16, 2004 1:03 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Once again, I've been rode hard and put up wet....."
-gdr-
128. Posted by gdr | October 16, 2004 1:03 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 01:03
129. Posted by Cowboy Blob | October 16, 2004 2:01 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Zeven gin-soaked raisins a day und I could CRUSH Laura Bush's schkull vit no pain in my kinuckles....
129. Posted by Cowboy Blob | October 16, 2004 2:01 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 02:01
130. Posted by MahaRichie | October 16, 2004 6:15 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Datz eet ! Security...remove dat idiot in the turd row...ya, da one drooling and pounding on dee drum....WHO in dee world goes around wearing ladeez panties on dare head in public??? and vot da hell does..Maha is not a good man suppose to mean???...Datz eet ..get him outta here...
130. Posted by MahaRichie | October 16, 2004 6:15 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 06:15
131. Posted by McGehee | October 16, 2004 7:00 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
As I walk through my mansion in the south of France
I take a look at my John and realise there's not much left
Cause I've been brassing and laughing so long that
Even my hubby thinks that my mind is gone
But I ain’t never slapped nobody that didn't deserve it
Why you get so upset, he's only a servant
You better watch how you talking, and where you walking
Or you uppity trash might be lined and shot
I really like to trip but I'm not on dope
It's just some white raisins I put in gin to soak ... fool
I'm the kinda B that little Dem ho's want to be like
On their knees in the night, saying prayers to we beat the right
Don't you want to live your lives bringing on my Teresa paradise
You could be spending most your lives living in my Teresa paradise
131. Posted by McGehee | October 16, 2004 7:00 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 07:00
132. Posted by Teflon93 | October 16, 2004 8:48 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Brains! BRAAAAAAAINS!"
132. Posted by Teflon93 | October 16, 2004 8:48 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 08:48
133. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 16, 2004 10:02 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Our opponent displays a certain disingenuity in his plans, his strategies, and in his creativity to succeed. He displays a certain knack for NOT being able to get the job done. He doesn't have the skills, the knowledge, nor especially the timing for the job. He resents our popularity and can't handle the truth that others don't flock to his values and beliefs. He has resorted to viscious lies and personal attacks when confronted with the blunt truth... What, No I'm not talking Dubya and the presidential election, I'm tellin' you about MamaBitchie and the Wizbang Weekend Caption Contest. "
133. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 16, 2004 10:02 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 10:02
134. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 16, 2004 10:34 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
In the end John Kerry's downfall would not be the debates, nor the swiftvet ads. His loss would later be attributed the fact that Rodney Dangerfield had started channeling throught Teresa Heinz Kerry.
"Tonight I would just like to apologize for my husbands remarks about Dick Cheney's daughter, that was a low blow. And, speaking of low blows, Mary, how's business." (rimshot)
134. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 16, 2004 10:34 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 10:34
135. Posted by Mark W | October 16, 2004 11:46 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
And then I wiggle my fingers like this and it makes John move like this...or wait...maybe it was like this...screw it, I can't remember. You're all unamerican anyway. I didn't say that you scumbags so SHOVE IT. Oh God my head hurts. Where are my raisins?
135. Posted by Mark W | October 16, 2004 11:46 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 11:46
136. Posted by Doug Book | October 16, 2004 12:56 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Yep...the bag of money John left me was this high!
136. Posted by Doug Book | October 16, 2004 12:56 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 12:56
137. Posted by Doug Book | October 16, 2004 1:09 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
And this is how much I was gonna leave John until he started on his mother and that integrity integrity bull****.
137. Posted by Doug Book | October 16, 2004 1:09 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 13:09
138. Posted by Larry | October 16, 2004 1:26 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"...and this microphone is about right. None of those Clinton cigars in my mansion."
138. Posted by Larry | October 16, 2004 1:26 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 13:26
139. Posted by Sobek | October 16, 2004 1:40 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"The pile of skulls of my victims is about this high. Why do you ask?"
"I taught the Emperor how to shoot lighting from his hands in Return of the Jedi. Don't make me demonstrate, 'cause it won't be pretty."
139. Posted by Sobek | October 16, 2004 1:40 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 13:40
140. Posted by m | October 16, 2004 2:07 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Thank Heav'n
For leetle girls ...
140. Posted by m | October 16, 2004 2:07 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 14:07
141. Posted by Rtfm | October 16, 2004 4:03 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
When my domestic partner is elected, there'll be stem cells soaked in the finest gin for everyone!!
141. Posted by Rtfm | October 16, 2004 4:03 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 16:03
142. Posted by The WASP | October 16, 2004 4:04 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Darlings.. please just do as John says he's much smarter than you are , after all he married me didn't he..
142. Posted by The WASP | October 16, 2004 4:04 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 16:04
143. Posted by The WASP | October 16, 2004 4:10 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
the diamond on this finger is so big I can't raise my hand over my head, don't you just hate that..
143. Posted by The WASP | October 16, 2004 4:10 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 16:10
144. Posted by OneDrummer | October 16, 2004 5:42 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"But beware of the dark side. Anger, fear, aggression; the dark side of the Force are they. Easily they flow, quick to join you in a fight. If once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny, consume you it will, as it did Obi-Wan's apprentice, Dick Cheney."
144. Posted by OneDrummer | October 16, 2004 5:42 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 17:42
145. Posted by Jeff | October 16, 2004 6:17 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
...and so taxes are for little people. You know, scumbags about this tall.
145. Posted by Jeff | October 16, 2004 6:17 PM |
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Posted on October 16, 2004 18:17
146. Posted by McGehee | October 16, 2004 6:54 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"One word: plastics!"
146. Posted by McGehee | October 16, 2004 6:54 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 18:54
147. Posted by Bruce | October 16, 2004 6:58 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Those of you who didn't register to vote at least 20 times, pickup your Kool-Aid from the table on my right.
147. Posted by Bruce | October 16, 2004 6:58 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 18:58
148. Posted by -S- | October 16, 2004 8:38 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"Eef everyone here will zjust vote theese many times eeeach, zere will be a big day for all. But first, it will be my big day. THEN you can all enjoy YOUR big day. But, mine firszt. Next, John. Then yours."
148. Posted by -S- | October 16, 2004 8:38 PM |
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Posted on October 16, 2004 20:38
149. Posted by Dean Satterlee | October 16, 2004 11:06 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"....and as the alien spacecraft hovered over me like this, the hatch doors opened and a blinding light drew me inside."
149. Posted by Dean Satterlee | October 16, 2004 11:06 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 16, 2004 23:06
150. Posted by jmaster | October 17, 2004 12:44 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Thank you Maha. It makes me happy to know that a least one other person appreciates what I have done.
But I have to give this contest to the poster who observed that the microphone looks like John Kerry from behind. It really does!
150. Posted by jmaster | October 17, 2004 12:44 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 17, 2004 00:44
151. Posted by firstbrokenangel | October 17, 2004 2:41 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
I love this: In the name of Christopher Reeve, *ARISE*! and the "Tootsie" references because they perfectly embody this picture and her as well.
But funny aside, this really is serious. Hotrod said...
"............IS THIS THE KIND OF 1ST LADY WE REALLY WANT TO LOOK AT EVERY DAY..........." As was mentioned in a previous article here and comments here, you have to look at the man, and his wife and think to yourself - Do these people really embody freedom, democracy, presidential behavior, attitude, and actions that are going to represent what the United States is all about??? This is not a game. Ronald Reagan's funeral reminded me of what the Presidential Office was all about and the class it takes to fill that spot and the spot of the First Lady.
This woman does not represent class, intelligence, respect or what our country stands for... you'd think with all her money, she could, at least, look better. Look good and keep her mouth shut for everytime she opens it, she says something really stupid and assinine. She is not a First Lady. Nancy Reagan was, Laura Bush is.....this woman should not even be seen much less give speeches. I do not want her representing me to the world and I sure as shit don't think her husband has the character or the class or anything else that is required of the "Presidential Office." They are an embarrassment and I wish they'd go away.
~C
151. Posted by firstbrokenangel | October 17, 2004 2:41 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 17, 2004 02:41
152. Posted by firstbrokenangel | October 17, 2004 2:44 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
To repeat myself from another post and to continue from that other post........ Is this the best the Democrats could come up with??? My Gawd, have they stooped so low they think we will accept them in the highest office of this land?? And allow these two scumbags represent us to the rest of the world?? IS THIS THE BEST WE CAN DO???
ewwwwww
~Cindy
152. Posted by firstbrokenangel | October 17, 2004 2:44 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 17, 2004 02:44
153. Posted by Spirit Fingers | October 17, 2004 9:33 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Confessions of an Heiress #418: My beauty routine largely consists of hanging out the window of a speeding limo to dry my nails and add extra volume to my hair.
153. Posted by Spirit Fingers | October 17, 2004 9:33 AM |
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Posted on October 17, 2004 09:33
154. Posted by joe | October 17, 2004 9:56 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Listen AFRICANERS !!!!!!NO YOU CANNOT SUBSTITUE WATERMELLON SEEDS FOR RAISENS----THOSE ARE USED FOR CONSTIPATION daaaaaaaa
154. Posted by joe | October 17, 2004 9:56 AM |
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Posted on October 17, 2004 09:56
155. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 17, 2004 11:41 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
And now Teresa is channeling Slim Pickens.
"Well They've said John Kerry isn't the sharpest tool in the Democratic shed. Let me tell you if they took out his brain and put it on the edge of a razor blade, it'd look just like a pea..., rolling down a... four... lane... highway."
155. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 17, 2004 11:41 AM |
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Posted on October 17, 2004 11:41
156. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 17, 2004 1:24 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
And thought she remained a staunch democratic until the end of her days, Natalie Maines had not foreseen the toll that the 'Anybody but Bush' mantra would take on her health and her appearance.
156. Posted by Rodney Dill | October 17, 2004 1:24 PM |
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Posted on October 17, 2004 13:24
157. Posted by daniel | October 17, 2004 3:09 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
KEVIN!
Here's a better soundclip to use with THK's photo; (la marseillaise sung by a woman).
http://www.marseillaise.org/audio/mireille_mathieu_-_la_marseillaise.mp3
4minutes & 17.8seconds
157. Posted by daniel | October 17, 2004 3:09 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 17, 2004 15:09
158. Posted by spacemonkey | October 17, 2004 3:45 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
'Don't hate me because I'm beautiful.'
158. Posted by spacemonkey | October 17, 2004 3:45 PM |
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Posted on October 17, 2004 15:45
159. Posted by Dean Satterlee | October 17, 2004 11:00 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
wax on......wax off
159. Posted by Dean Satterlee | October 17, 2004 11:00 PM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 17, 2004 23:00
160. Posted by radio | October 17, 2004 11:24 PM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
"And then my Johnny will raise the minimum wage to $200,000"
or
"Thanks to coming to my 'Pay Less Than the Peasants" tax strategies seminar. While those goobers think Bush got them a good deal with his tax cuts, I'll clue you to the real secrets of living like a billionaire and paying a 12% rate. First have your hubby get a part-time job with good health care benefits, including Botox and skin tinting."
160. Posted by radio | October 17, 2004 11:24 PM |
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Posted on October 17, 2004 23:24
161. Posted by Kevin | October 18, 2004 1:41 AM | Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Update: Winners announced. Comments now closed.
161. Posted by Kevin | October 18, 2004 1:41 AM |
Score: 0 (0 votes cast)
Posted on October 18, 2004 01:41